You talk about leaving home for years and all the plans you intend to pursue afterwards. You talk about life after high school for years... and then it's finally right in front of you, and you suddenly don't know what to do.
I never necessarily wanted to leave the home I'd known my entire life. It was more of the fact that I felt called to leave. At the time, I didn't realize who it was doing that calling. I knew very well that staying home and going to college in my hometown was an option (a much more affordable one at that) ... but I didn't want to do it. I had the feeling that if I stayed, I would never leave. I would get too comfortable. I would allow myself to feel trapped. In hindsight, staying would have left me trapped in a lifestyle I am no longer comfortable with.
There are many reasons I'm grateful for having taken the leap of faith to completely uproot my comfortable life and plant it somewhere new. I could give you an endless list of reasons why, but the main reason I'm most grateful I'm left is because of the relationship I found with God.
My hometown had nothing to offer me after graduation. Unfortunate circumstances left me feeling lonely and lost. At that point, why wouldn't I want to go somewhere far away where I could start completely over? So, that's exactly what I did. Though reluctant (for nearly the entire first year, might I add), I packed my bags and moved in with someone who had been a complete stranger to me until a few months prior to move in day.
During a time of life where many people my age choose to run far from God and shackle themselves to sin, I decided it was time for me to try and find my relationship with Him instead - the one I didn't realize I needed so badly, and one I don't think I would have found if I stayed put.
I am most grateful when it comes to the relationship with Christ I found after leaving home. I no longer had my parents to hold my hand every step of the way, so I learned to trust God - something I should have been doing all along. Sometimes it takes losing what you think is all you've got to show you what you've always had.
Leaving home led me to Christ, which led me to a new spiritual community, which led me to the greatest major on Earth (also a major that gives me the chance to disciple. How cool is that!?). Sure, leaving home was terrifying, but God showed me exactly where He wanted me to be by doing so and, in turn, showed me how badly I needed Him.
I get homesick all the time. I shed a lot of tears when the weekend has come and gone, and its time for me to go back to my second home. But I wouldn't change any of it. My God is sovereign, and He has shown me just how mysteriously He works.
