Grace.
It's a five letter word that's given out so freely to others, but kept from ourselves. A person punishes oneself any time they make a mistake; asking themselves how they could have been so stupid, or telling themselves that they should have known better. The interesting thing is, when that person is told of another person's mistakes, they say the exact opposite. Those people are told that everything will be okay, and that no one is perfect; that everyone makes mistakes. Why are we so easily to able to give others grace, but not ourselves?
Forgiveness is important. It's the only way to be able to move on and have a fresh start. There's a famous phrase that says "You don't forgive the person that hurt you for their satisfaction, you forgive yourself to heal your own heart". The same applies to forgiving ourselves. If a person constantly puts themselves down for the mistakes that they make, then they become bound by those mistakes, and they in turn have dominion over a person.
It can be very easy to get caught in the trap of forgetting to forgive ourselves. This is because that behavior is seen as productive rather than destructive. Often times, a person just wants to be better than they were, therefore they will not let themselves forget the time that they messed up. That moment serves as an example of what could happen when we fall out of line. The only problem with this way of thinking is that it invokes fear, and it can actually cause a person to do more of what they are trying to avoid. The harshness that we place on ourselves can turn into a never ending cycle.
Rather than placing so much focus on what we have done wrong in the past, it is important that we focus on all that we can do right in the future. Just as we would remind someone else that yesterday is in the past, and that today is a new beginning, we should offer ourselves the same advice. Life is hard enough. We do not need to become our own worst enemy by being so critical of ourselves that we lose sight of the wonderful people that our friends and family see us as.
Forgiving others can be so easy, but by reminding ourselves that we too are imperfect humans can make the forgiveness process just as easy to apply to ourselves. A person gains nothing more from putting pressure on themselves than a constant feeling of dissatisfaction and fear. A huge weight can be lifted off of a person's shoulders once they decide to let go of their imperfections. Life is too short to carry around the burdens from our past. Start extending the gift of grace to yourself just as you would give it to someone else. You deserve to benefit from the feelings of freedom that emerges from forgiveness just as much as the next person.
"Grace means all of your mistakes serve a purpose instead of serving shame."
