Ex... Such a short little word can invoke the strongest feelings in a person. No one goes into a relationship wanting one, but more often than not it is the result of something we once cherished, above anything else. No one really prepares you for the end of a relationship, but it hurts nonetheless. It hurts so much that people tend to replace the love and trust in their hearts with hate and doubt. It’s not your fault to feel betrayed or hurt. You might have every right to be.
However, something you are to be blamed for is the decision to slander and insult a prior partner.
I am aware that every situation is different. That's why this article isn't meant for the girls that were toxic relationships, mentally or physically abusive or anything less than a loving, devoted companionship. This is about the relationships where spite and resentment breed after a breakup. If you truly loved someone, you would never talk badly about their name regardless of the breakup. In the end, you chose to date a person and invested time and emotion into them for one reason: you loved them. You may not love them anymore, but there was a point in time where you once did. Because of this, your respect for that person should not falter.
Just like you, they made the same decision to invest time and emotion into a relationship. They gave you their trust and confided in you. This that shows no matter what feelings are harbored as a result of the breakup, respect should still be given. The kind of respect that stops you from trash talking them every time you hear their name. The respect that prevents you from writing unnecessary posts on social media in an effort to “get back” at them. The respect that prevents you from trying to make jabs at them with a new fling, when in reality, it's just an effort to forget them.
The respect that, in the end, shouldn’t have to be respect but rather, the human decency to not have ill feelings towards a person who once loved you so dearly.
You don’t have to put them on a pedestal or deify them because in the end, you did break up and they are your ex. However, just because they are your ex doesn’t mean you still can’t respect them, either. You might think “Well why does this only apply to me and not my ex?” Well, it does. It applies to them just as much as it applied to you. In the end, being the bigger and more mature one makes you a better person and will make you happier.
It’s not always easy, but life isn’t always about making things easy. It's about doing the things that are right.