It’s been a while since I thought of him. He’s stopped being the star of my dreams and I no longer think of telling him about my day, whether it be good or bad. In all ways, I have moved on. I get up in the morning and find joy in my life, both in my new relationships and friendships.
It’s been a while since I thought of him, but seeing him this past weekend with you made my loss so much more real. It doesn’t hurt. It makes it feel final. Final in a way that says I'm over you, and you’re over me. Final in a way that will allow me to move on to a new and healthy relationship.
I hope your relationship is nothing like the one I experienced with him. Maybe our past of fighting and lies will have taught him that honesty is the best policy. Maybe he’s finally realized that he is replaceable. I should have left sooner; I knew you were in his life before I was out of his. But I just kept hoping that he would realize the good he had in his life, or maybe I should have seen that I could find better for mine.
Maybe we weren’t meant to work out. I hope that he does find that kind of happiness I was looking for with him with you. I don’t have any ill will for him. Our relationship helped me grow as a person, and his presence in my life brought me joy and taught me a lesson on what true love should really look like.
I hope your relationship is nothing like the one I experienced with him. I hope he’s learned to share his life and feelings with you. Maybe he’s ready to have something real and honest, and I'm glad it’s with a woman as kind as you. I hope that he becomes the man I always knew he would become and achieves all the goals he has set for his life, even though I won't be experiencing them right along with him.
I hope that you never have to experience a night alone crying over the fact that he hasn’t called, texted, or seen you for the past week. I hope that you don’t have to feel alone in a relationship meant for two. He means well, maybe he wasn’t ready to love someone with all his heart. Maybe he wasn’t ready for “happily ever after,” but I was. Maybe he was waiting for you.
Maybe I just wasn’t the one, and I hope that he treats you with the respect and love all women deserve. I hope you find soils in your role as his new girlfriend. I hope that you find the love I wished I could have found in him. I also hope that you treat him the way I did, with love and admiration. He deserves the world, but so do I, and that’s why I left.