A Letter To The Person I Still Love
Start writing a post

A Letter To The Person I Still Love

It's okay to still love him, and it's okay to still care.

A Letter To The Person I Still Love

For the past few months, I’ve been fine, I’ve been happy, I’ve been me. I’ve come to accept the way things are and I’ve come to terms with how things are going to be.

I realized I shouldn’t set expectations, and things are going to happen as they please. I tell myself that I don’t love you, and I understand the mistakes I have made, and I have (and still am) putting in my best efforts to change. Every hurtful moment I have caused you replays in my brain. I know there is nothing I can do to change things and It’s a position I put myself in. I don’t blame you for a single thing. Never have and I never will.

I know there is some hope for me. Somehow, somewhere. In this, I’m becoming a better person. You’re one person I never wanted to lose and wish I realized how bad it would have hurt to lose you before that nightmare became true. But for now, I’m done begging, I’m done crying, and I’m done putting my life on hold for you. But I’m just not done loving you. And I know, that’s so pathetic to say but it’s true, I’m just not done loving you.

But I know that you are done loving me. That one day you will have someone new to love, and maybe one day so will I. But I do know that our paths crossed for a reason, and right now, I’m still unsure why.

We “click” as you have put it. We speak the same language. There’s just something about “us” that “goes.” I desire you in every way possible. Your fashion, your hair, your charm. Your passion and thinking drive me to set higher goals and make me feel like anything is achievable. You’re the best motivational speaker. You’re the only person who's advice I value wholeheartedly, I seek the comfort in your eyes, you know exactly what I need when I need it most (a hug). You crave my smile, and know exactly when there’s something wrong no matter how many times I tell you “I’m fine.” You’re the best to goof around with, the best to adventure with and the best to cry with.

But for now, I know that I’m your best friend, and yes, you are mine. I know you are Ross and I am Rachel, and that all things just take a little time.

We have made mistakes together, and we have made wonderful memories together. But I know that our time is up, and there’s no going back from here. I never want to know a life that doesn’t have you in it, because honestly, I am thankful for you.

I know whatever girl gets you next will be the luckiest, and I’ll be honored to meet her. I’m not saying I won’t be jealous, because… I will. And I’ll want to be her best friend, and I’ll want to make sure she never makes the mistakes that I have made, because maybe if I didn’t, I would be that girl.

But I always want you to be happy, and at times it will be hard, and at times I will cry, but I’m in it and I can’t get out (Yeezus).

Although I still may not know the reason why we are still apart of each other’s lives, and I’m not sure when I’ll be able to not be jealous, and not be afraid but I’ll never be able to forgive myself. I don’t expect you to either. I look to you on my hardest days even though I know I shouldn’t, but maybe I should.

Because things do happen for a reason, and sometimes those reasons suck. In this case, yeah, they suck,

I’m always here to guide you through the hard things in life. The tough situations you just can’t wrap your head around, or if you just need a little motivation or a little distraction. I understand that it isn’t romantic anymore and that the fire has died. That even though the desire is still there, it’s not what we are meant to be doing.

I’m terrified of change. Always have been, always will be. But I know this change is healthy, and I know this change will be good because you’re still here for a reason.

Although I still may not know that reason, I do know one thing right now for sure. Is that I’m still not done loving you, but for right now that’s okay.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

6 Things Owning A Cat Has Taught Me

This one's for you, Spock.

6 Things Owning A Cat Has Taught Me
Liz Abere

Owning a pet can get difficult and expensive. Sometimes, their vet bills cost hundreds of dollars just for one visit. On top of that, pets also need food, a wee wee pad for a dog, a litter box with litter for a cat, toys, and treats. Besides having to spend hundreds of dollars on them, they provide a great companion and are almost always there when you need to talk to someone. For the past six years, I have been the proud owner of my purebred Bengal cat named Spock. Although he's only seven years and four months old, he's taught me so much. Here's a few of the things that he has taught me.

Keep Reading...Show less

Kinder Self - Eyes

You're Your Own Best Friend

Kinder Self - Eyes

It's fun to see all of the selfies on social media, they are everywhere. I see pictures with pouty lips, duck lips and pucker lips. I see smokey eyes, huge fake lashes and nicely done nose jobs, boob jobs and butt lifts. Women working out in spandex, tiny tops and flip flops. I see tight abs and firm butts, manicured nails and toes, up dos and flowing hair. "Wow", I think to myself," I could apply tons of make-up, spend an hour on my hair, pose all day and not look like that. Maybe I need a longer stick!"

Keep Reading...Show less

Rap Songs With A Deeper Meaning

Rap is more than the F-bomb and a beat. Read what artists like Fetty, Schoolboy Q, Drake, and 2Pac can teach you.

Rap artist delivers performance on stage
Photo by Chase Fade on Unsplash

On the surface, rap songs may carry a surface perception of negativity. However, exploring their lyrics reveals profound hidden depth.Despite occasional profanity, it's crucial to look beyond it. Rap transcends mere wordplay; these 25 song lyrics impart valuable life lessons, offering insights that extend beyond the conventional perception of rap music.

Keep Reading...Show less

21 Drinks For Your 21st Birthday

Maybe don't try them all in one day...

21 Drinks For Your 21st Birthday

My 21st birthday is finally almost here. In honor of finally turning 21, I thought I'd share 21 fun drinks since it's finally legal for me to drink them.

Some of these drinks are basic, but some of them are a little more interesting. I thought they all looked pretty good and worth trying, so choose your favorites to enjoy at your big birthday bash!

Keep Reading...Show less

Ancient Roman Kings: 7 Leaders of Early Rome

The names and dates of the reigns of the first four kings, as well as the alternation of Sabin and Latin names, are more legendary than historical. The last three kings, of Etruscan origin, have an existence which seems less uncertain.

inside ancient roman building
Photo by Chad Greiter on Unsplash

It is evident that all this is only a legend although archeology shows us little by little that these kings if they did not exist as the ancient history, describes them, have at least in the very Outlines were real as chief of a shepherd’s tribe. The period when kings ruled Rome could estimate at 245 years.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments