Your friends tell you that you deserve better.
They tell you that he "isn't worth it," and that the way he treats you "isn't love." You hear what they are saying. You know that he is hurtful sometimes, and that he doesn't always treat you how you'd like - but you love him. You see him in ways that they don't, and even though you get so fed up sometimes, you're just not ready to walk away yet. And that is okay.
It's okay to not be ready to let go even though your friends say that you "just need to end it already." They don't realize how hard ending it really is. Walking away from someone that you love isn't a split second decision. It takes time to build up the strength to leave. This person has become a part of your life; losing him means starting all over again - and that is scary. So to all the girls who aren't ready, here are the things your friends aren't telling you.
First off, it's okay. It's okay to love someone who you know is hurting you, because you know that they are only doing it because they are hurting too. Your friends see a person who "doesn't care," and will "break your heart," but you see a person who needs you, just like you need him. Your friends may not understand how you can stay with someone who treats you the way he does, but they only see what you show them - they don't see him how you see him - and how you see him is all that really matters.
Second, you're not stupid. You're not stupid for staying with someone who you know isn't treating you how you deserve to be treated. We have ALL done that, and anyone who judges you for it has probably been in your shoes as well. It's easy to push away all of the bad things in a relationship, and hold on to what is good. If you still have something you're holding onto, then there is still hope and having hope doesn't make you stupid.
Third, it's your decision. You don't have to listen to peer pressure, and you certainly shouldn't care what other people think. So what if they say you have "no respect," or so what if they tell you that you're "wasting your time." It's your decision, and whatever you decide, make sure you have real friends who will support you through it. Nobody knows your relationship better than you do, so if you're not ready to let go, then you're not ready to let go.
Fourth, it's okay to cry. Do not feel ashamed to cry. If you're hurting, you have every right to let it all out- and your real friends will be there to listen and guide you through it. Do not feel like you're doing this to yourself - you're not. You are not hurting yourself, regardless of what your friends tell you. Don't feel like this is your fault - it isn't. Cry until you can't cry anymore- it's okay.
Fifth, do not feel embarrassed. You shouldn't have to feel embarrassed to be with someone. So what if everyone knows how bad it is? If you have moments of bliss that make you happier than when you are sad, then it can't be as bad as it seems. Don't feel afraid to show off how happy you are - because the only opinions that matter are yours and his.
Lastly, when you're ready, you will know it. If you're still going to your friends asking them what they would do, you're not ready. If you still wait for your phone to buzz hoping that it's him, you're not ready. You will know when you're ready - but how? Because one day you will wake up, you will look in the mirror, and you will say "I'm strong." One day you will wake up and realize that you will thank yourself for walking away. One day you will wake up and say "I can do this," and you will.
And it will be epic.
