I’ve noticed that with people in my generation, there is this weird dynamic of simultaneously feeling like you deserve the world and also like you deserve nothing. We think that because we did okay in school we deserve to get into an amazing college, but then when we mess up the slightest thing we think that we deserve for our lives to fall apart.

I think that the second part of that is the thing that bothers me the most. As a perfectionist, I rarely notice when I blow my failures out of proportion but am quick to notice how ridiculous other people seem when they do the exact same thing. I have had some friends and people that I know do this, and it drives me crazy. It is so easy to judge yourself when you mess up but when someone you care about does it it’s amazing how silly you think they are because you believe in them so much. For some reason when my friends screw up I don’t think anything of it. For some reason I never think any less of them as people and I never question whether or not they are going to be able to come back from what happened.

One of my best friends has told me before that she thinks that she has screwed up so much that she doesn’t deserve to be happy or to be successful. She’ll tell me about how she has ruined her chances because of not doing well in school and how she’s just going to have to spend her life settling. I don’t really care about anything that she has done or failed to do, because I love her and I know that she is amazing. I think we all feel like that sometimes but you have to realize that every single day is a chance to start over, and there is nothing you can do to make yourself less deserving of success and happiness.

Another person I know got broken up with by his girlfriend, and spent lots of time telling me about how it was all his fault and he screwed everything up. I had the same reaction to this as I would with my best friend; I don’t think that you can do anything that means that you don’t deserve love or don’t deserve to be happy. Even if you are in a relationship and you messed things up, you can’t get so down on yourself that you think you or your love is worth any less. At the end of the day, you are a person, and you screw up just like every other person, and you deserve the world. You may not always get it, but you have to know that you’re worth it. If you ever doubt that, think about how you feel when someone you love messes up, and then become your own best friend.