I feel like those three words above have been beating the dead horse for years. The phrase has been used to comfort those who have been cheated on, who got their heart broken, who got fired from a job, who didn't get into the school they wanted to, etc. I mean, the list goes on and on. So many things in life never go according to our plan, and when they don't, it's like we try to cope by telling ourselves that "we deserve better than this."
Well, I think we all deserve a lot better in our lives, while also saying that we often accept people and things who give us less. We create the life we want, but there are also events that we have no control over. Fate vs. Free Will; it's one of the oldest debates we've tried to solve. That, and the chicken or the egg theory.
Do we really have total control over our lives? Or is everything already pre-determined? And how do we then live our lives? Do we simply let life live out its course? Or do we still take an active role in our own lives, and still try to make it what we want?
I don't have an absolute answer for you. Maybe check with Socrates or another great philosopher. But I believe in both. I believe I have the power to make my life the way I want it, but I believe a higher power is still making things happen. I believe there are things in this life we have no control over, but I also believe that there are. Realizing you deserve better is one of them.
I say this to myself when I say this to you: stop accepting less. Don't let someone ruin your day when they take credit for what you did or make you feel inadequate. You deserve better: so stick up for yourself. Remember that if you deserve better than that kind of treatment, then you must remind people around you who think that they can treat you poorly.
Don't let someone toy with your heart. Do not let them play games with you. Don't let them use your body when they know your heart is where your mind is at. Sure, it may seem like love. But you know better. And you deserve better. So demand more. Demand that they stick around, and realize that the games are over; that you would rather risk losing them than accept minimal love. And you have to believe it too. You have to be willing to lose people in your life if that means you will grow better.
Don't let someone tell you you're not good enough. That job you applied for? You're not qualified. That recipe you just tried? It was terrible. That class you're struggling with? You're going to fail. I say to you: who cares? Keep trying. If you deserve better, which I think you do, then try harder. Work until you are qualified. Cook until you know that recipe and could make it blindfolded. Study for that class harder than you ever have before. If you think you deserve better, you're going to have to work for it.
We often say "you deserve better," in such a passive voice. And it just occurred to me, how are we ever planning on making life better when we're constantly feeling sorry for ourselves? We need to start saying it in an active voice, and actually believing it. Half the battle is actually convincing yourself that you do deserve better. So stop beating yourself down, and realize that you can have a lot more in life if you actually believed in yourself. Go out, actively make choices, and give yourself the life you know you deserve. You deserve more, so stop accepting less. No one's going to do it for you.
