I Went From Hating Myself To Loving Myself
Start writing a post
Health and Wellness

I Went From Hating Myself To Loving Myself In 365 Days

What a difference a year can make.

I Went From Hating Myself To Loving Myself In 365 Days

Right before I broke up with my ex-boyfriend, I was in such a depressed mood. I would not take care of myself — I guess I wasn't ready to let go of that relationship. My mood was continuously low, never high. Finally, I got the courage to end that relationship. He moved on really quickly, but I am still single and taking time for myself.

For about a month I felt free, but slowly the feeling of being lonely crept in and smacked me across the face. My anxiety hit me up and said "you have no friends because no one likes you." I believed my anxiety. But around what was supposed to be our three year anniversary, I started letting things go. I knew when he said we would talk again, he didn't mean it. He was just making me feel better. For a whole month after that, I started to feel so good about myself. I turned 18 and was on the path to graduate.

Shortly after my birthday, everyone was talking about coronavirus (COVID-19) in China. At the time, I thought we have at least enough warning to get some precautions in place. I was in such a good mood. I was experiencing the last days of senior year. The first two weeks I was hopeful. Then April hit and I had to remind myself that everything was going to be OK. I was having doubts about graduating. I was having doubts about going to college. Everything felt ruined. I knew people had it worse, and that's what I focused on. I started working on my school because I was getting behind really badly. I was in a dark place for about two weeks, wanting to do nothing but sleep and eat. I gained like 20 pounds.

I think if I didn't live in a state with such a good governor we would be such a hot spot right now. I live in Kentucky and right away he took action. Doing online schooling was fine for me. I prefer that to school in-person. I excelled and turned in about 90 percent of my assignments. I graduated in my parents' car. I loved the creative graduation ceremony.

When May rolled around, I started focusing on my mental health and talking more to my therapist about how things were affecting me. I made some friends a few months before school closed down. Really they were just friends I had while I was dating my ex that I kinda pushed away, but I explained to them that I was sorry for acting the way I did. We talked and I pointed out where I went wrong and it was amazing. They all moved away for college and I'm still here I'm my little hometown.

The summer came and passed quickly and I was able to take care of myself physically and mentally. I started eating better and talking to myself better. One thing I did that was really bad was use horrible language about myself. Now I use complementary words. I've focused on some of my hobbies like painting and reading. When I was a kid I used to read like two or three books a week. Now I read one book a year.

In July, I lost one of my childhood dogs. He passed away unexpectedly and it really hurt my family. We had three dogs with him and went down to two — there was a hole and it was hollow. We ended up getting another dog and she is so amazing. We feel complete again, but we still miss him dearly.

I started college in August and all my classes are online except one. I'm OK with online classes, but it's hard to get to know people. I wanted a college experience, not the typical one but at least one with friends. Now I just have work and no friends. I'm still learning every day to take care of myself and speak kind things to myself.

A year ago I would have told you I was stuck in bed almost every day not wanting to go to school.

Today, I enjoy it and love myself and work on myself. It's a journey and one worth going on.

Report this Content

"Schitt's Creek" has quickly become an absolute fan favorite in the US and Canada and their seven wins at the Emmy Awards last night proves just that.

Keep Reading... Show less

10 Ideas For A Cozy Date Night In When It's Just Too Chilly To Go Outside

Because sometimes you just need to be snuggled up with your boo.


Yup, like most things, summer must come to an end, but just because summer is ending doesn't mean date nights have to end with it. Sure, there will be no more water park trips or picnic dates for a while, but surely there are many more date night ideas you don't need a clear sky and 80+ degree day to make happen.

That's what this list is for. Below are 10 ideas for date nights inside so that while you're stoking the fire at home this fall and winter, you're also keeping the fire alive in your relationship.

Keep Reading... Show less
Politics and Activism

The Steelers Are Honoring Antwon Rose Jr., A Victim Of Police Brutality, For The 2020 Season

The Pittsburgh Steelers have united by wearing the name of a victim of police brutality, Antwon Rose Jr., for the 2020 NFL season.


NFL players are permitted to wear decals on their helmets this season in honor of victims of systemic racism. However, the Pittsburgh Steelers have decided to unite and all wear the same name on their helmets this season: Antwon Rose Jr.

Keep Reading... Show less

I will preach this until the day I'm in the ground, nudes are an essential.

They are just as essential as toilet paper is right now and they have more power than just being a photo that's hidden on your iPhone. Nudes aren't just a way to turn on the guy/girl you've been hanging out with, but they can elicit a feeling of confidence and pure sexuality.

Keep Reading... Show less

During the pandemic, I've found out so much about myself by being single. I've learned that self-care comes first, I don't have to worry about impressing anyone else with my cooking skills other than myself, and it's perfectly OK to date yourself. So, for my fellow singles, here are 11 at home solo-date ideas (that are COVID-19 friendly) you can partake in any time you want to, to rock the single life this fall.

Keep Reading... Show less

Just when we thought 2020 couldn't get any more unpredictable, we find out that Ruth Bader Ginsburg has died at 87 of complications from pancreatic cancer.

Regardless of where you might stand politically, you can't deny that the was a very honorable woman, who has accomplished a lot in her lifetime. Writing majority opinions for many cases such as United States v. Virginia, and Olmstead v. L.C., she has paved the way for many women, showing that no matter what obstacles stand in your way, you can achieve your goals.

Keep Reading... Show less

These are just a few of my favorite responses! Please read and enjoy. This is probably some of the best advice you will read!

Keep Reading... Show less
Politics and Activism

Coronavirus, The Arizona State Legislature, And The 2020 Election

The Arizona State Legislature might shift its majority in the House and Senate come 2021.


Arizona State Senator Martín Quezada spoke today on legislative changes that may occur in 2021 due to the possibility of Arizona becoming a bipartisan state.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

I Asked 27 People What Positive Things Happened To Them Despite The Pandemic, And Their Answers Are Inspiring

“We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope." - Martin Luther King Jr.


Let's be real: COVID SUCKS! So many events have been ruined and not being able to see friends and families really blows. But, I reached out to people and asked if anyone had anything positive happen for them despite the pandemic and I got so many answers!!! Here are a few that were shared with me!

Keep Reading... Show less
Politics and Activism

RBG Just Passed Away, And Trump Is Already Jumping At The Chance To Replace Her

I think it's a worse time than ever to put another conservative on the Supreme Court.


Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg, otherwise known as RBG, sadly passed away Friday, September 18 after a battle with metastatic pancreatic cancer. This woman was tough, no doubts about that. This was her fifth — yes, you read that correctly — bout with cancer over the span of two decades.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments