From as early as we can remember, we "understood" the concept of couples. Two people, who liked/loved one another, being together in a romantic way. What we weren't able to grasp is the fact that there can be friendships that never evolve into being a couple.

Growing up, all the boys were friends with boys because we all liked to play rough, get dirty, and talk about how the girls had "cooties." The same was also true for the girls playing together and thinking that the boys had "cooties." As we progressively got older, we slowly realized that we could actually have friends of the opposite gender, which was kind of a big deal.

Fast forward to high school aged kids and their friendships. By now they've established solid friendships with the same gender, as well as with the opposite gender. This, may come as no shock, as many of you reading this will simply think "Well of course, I have many friends that are the same gender and many that are also of the opposite gender. So what?" The so what is; is that these opposite gender friendships come at a price. this price being that all of your friends and their friends will immediately think that there is something romantic going on, and there will have to be some form of a romantic relationship formed of this. Then, once the rumors get around, and everyone starts talking, it then becomes awkward for the two of you to be seen together, or even be friends, because then everyone will just automatically assume that you are romantically involved.

Now why is this? Some will just say that it's just common sense. That if two people like each other enough to be best/great friends, then they should just date and be romantic partners. But that isn't always the case, and yet we still cease to acknowledge this as so. It has become a social stigma, if you will, to have a friend of the opposite gender (or same gender, depending on your sexual orientation) as "just a friend." We has a generation, and even some of the older generation always see this as weird, or if you're already in a relationship, they see this as a threat. But it all comes down to one thing, it has become the norm that, if you and another person click and bond so well together, then it means that you are meant to be with each other.

Let's break this down and look at our friend-group influences. Our friend group already has expectations for us, and they assume that they know what we're thinking at all time. Therefore they have to know the way we feel towards someone, right? Wrong. Most of our friends are pushy and tell us to do something and go after someone because they see the bond that the two people share. But this isn't necessarily the best plan of action. Friends are pushy, and will try to get you to make rash decisions that sometimes aren't exactly what you want them to be. They'll convince you that you and this other person are meant to be together and that "It'll totally work out." Even though two people can bond so perfectly as friends, doesn't ever mean that they are meant to be more than that.

Now, let's talk about the negativity associated with all of this. Recently it has become more and more apparent that use of the word "friendzone" has a negative connotation. Why? Why is it so negative to have a best friend that doesn't want to date you? Personally that is a wonderful thing, but this generation only looks at things the wrong way. Two people, who could very well date each other, can make perfect friends simply for the fact that they understand each others mentality, morals, attitudes, personality, etc. Sounds like the good backbone for a relationship, right? Wrong again. We as humans can share these things with many people, some we are attracted to, some we aren't. Some we wouldn't mind dating, some that we have no interest in dating. This doesn't mean that everyone that we bond with and have a decent number of things in common with, we should date. Some two people won't mesh well in one important aspect, but will jump into dating, since everyone else is saying "Hey. The to of you are such great friends, you'd be a perfect couple." From here, is where the friendships and that bond fall apart. Some people aren't meant to be together, no matter how much they have in common. Maybe they don't want to deal with this person everyday in a sensual way. Maybe they aren't used to being romantic with this person and they don't know how to act. Maybe that now they're actually dating, they have other expectations for each other and end up fighting when they don't meet them.

Here's what to take from all of this.

1. Be friends with the people you're meant to be friends with. Date the people that you're meant to date.

Simple, right? Right! Ignore your friends when they are the ones telling you to date someone, but you're not telling yourself that you want to date someone. Friends; don't try to force one of your friends to date someone when you have no real idea of what they are feeling.

2.Don't try to make a mountain out of a mole hill.

As a person who is best friends with someone who is datable, don't try to make it into a situation to where you feel like you should date. If it happens, it happens. If it doesn't, it doesn't. Don't ever try to escalate something, when it's not even certain if it's worth escalating.

3. Stop making the friendships negative.

It's as simple as that. Embrace the "friendzone" and stop making it into a negative statement. If two people only want to be friends, and they agree that they only want to be friends - ALLOW THEM TO ONLY BE FRIENDS. Stop making the social media "memes" about guys being put in the friendzone. Stop calling them out and making fun of them, because you have no clue how they feel, or the fact that they may even want to be there in the first place.