Some people ask, "Why did you join a fraternity? To party and get the girls?" Those people don't understand why we join. Yes, many fraternities are "those" fraternities that show up in the news regarding drugs and sexual assault, but there's a whole other side to fraternity life no one sees besides the actives, the alumni, and the community.
At first, I wasn't sure about joining a fraternity, mainly because I was worried about being hazed. Gladly, I was talked into joining. When I attended recruitment events, I looked around at the fellow recruits and said, "Do I want to be a part of this place?" But like any fraternity hopeful, I did my research on the group. I realized even though I would be stuck with 40 other men in my school, there were about 260,000 men out there wearing those same letters.
Joining a fraternity certainly has its ups and downs -- every organization experiences that. But during my new-member process, I noticed I had 40 other men to lean on in times of need. When I joined my fraternity, I was going through some major health issues that took a huge toll on me; at the same time, my grandmother was having problems of her own. I remember one day, after a ritual, these men walked up to me and gave me a huge hug. No matter what, I knew my new brothers were here to stay.
Once I started my journey in the brotherhood, I quickly recognized the difference between a fraternity man and frat boy. A fraternity man focuses on the good -- academics, the community, himself, and his brotherhood -- whereas a frat boy may only focus on Natty Light and girls. My Big would always correct me when I used the term "frat," even if I meant it to be an abbreviation.
Fraternity men come together to focus on community development through their philanthropies, community service, or university service. We hold community service and philanthropic help in high esteem. Fraternity men make sure they are giving back to the community, which has given so much to them.
Fraternity men come together for their ritual. My old Greek Life advisor would always tell her Greek Life students to "live by your ritual." We join in ritual to rid ourselves of the bad and focus on the good and being with one another. From there, we bring our values out to our community and share them day by day: Love, Charity and Esteem.
But through these elements, we create a brotherhood. I love my brothers no matter what. From arguments to hitting the pub together, I have seen it all and I couldn't be prouder of what we have accomplished. I love those moments of sitting in the hallway and throwing things at one another, of sitting in the cafeteria for an hour and discussing shenanigans, then playing "Smash" in the lounge and yelling at one another because Bowser suicided Dark Pit.
From all this, it is clear: A fraternity man is someone who loves the community, himself, and also his brotherhood. I am not sure where I would be if it weren't for these gentlemen. I am proud to call myself a fraternity man, and my fraternity has helped me become a proper fraternity man.
Love, Charity and Esteem.
