During my senior year in high school, I mentioned to a staff member that I was in the foster care system. Taking in his look of disbelief, I asked him why he seemed so surprised? The staff member stated, “I never would have imagined...you have good grades.” In that moment, I didn't know whether to be offended or take it as a compliment so I uttered a “thank you” and walked away.

Attending college is something I always strived for and as my last year of high school was coming to an end, I began to receive acceptance letters from the colleges I applied to. I was very excited because everything I had worked for was paying off, but at the same time I couldn't shake the worry of how was I going to be able to afford to go? I suddenly became discouraged about my future because I wanted to go to college but didn't have the financial means to pay for it. Where was I going to get $20,000 or more each year for tuition and living expenses?

College for me was my way out, a new beginning yet now my future did not seem so promising. I was adopted before my 13th birthday so I did not qualify for the financial assistance most foster children received. The relationship between my adopted mother and me was almost non-existent because she kicked me out of her house when I was 15. I had no one to help pay for my education. When I was 17, my adopted mother’s brother’s family took me in. They had helped me out already so much that I was not going to continue to ask them for any assistance with college. The only source of income I had was a job at a small burger joint called Brolly Hut and it did not pay enough to fund four years of college. My only hope was to apply for every single scholarship that was available to me as it was the only way I could make my dreams come true.

On April 1, 2014, I received an email congratulating me on being accepted into the Guardian Scholars Program at San Diego State University. Guardian Scholars is a scholarship program that helps support former foster youth, homeless youth, and wards of the court seeking a college degree. I could not believe that I was accepted into SDSU and the Guardian Scholars Program because I was losing hope in being awarded any scholarships.

Being in the Guardian Scholar program has truly been a blessing. Not only did I receive financial support which I heavily needed, but emotional support and a sense of family as well. The staff members are amazing, but there was one in particular who I grew to admire. He was the Program Specialist for G.S., and he made sure that everyone felt a sense of belonging. He was another reason why I decided to come to SDSU because he never stopped calling and emailing me. He showed me that he cared. That was a big deal for me because he did not know me very well, but he made sure I made it to SDSU. He always checked in with me and although he's no longer a staff member at SDSU he continues to check and see how I am doing.

The Guardian Scholar Program requires members to attend EOP Summer Bridge. Summer Bridge is an amazing program where incoming freshman can take two college classes for six weeks during the summer. The program allows for you to become familiarized with the college campus and structure of classes. Some of the people I met in EOP Summer Bridge have become my best friends and it was an amazing experience that I wish I could do all over again.

Although I wanted a new beginning, I was still intimidated of actually going for it, especially now that my opportunity had come along. In my summer bridge cohort, there were 11 other guardian scholars mixed within about 150 other EOP students. The first Guardian Scholar I met was Sal. The only reason I knew he was a Guardian Scholar was because they gave us lanyards that said Guardian Scholars all over them. Sal was also a person who didn't mind sharing details of his life if he believed it would help another person. Once Sal told me his story, I started to be more secure about who I was and where I came from. I am a former foster youth. I thought by coming to college I would have to forget about my struggle and that being in the foster care system would never be mentioned again. I further felt more comfortable as a former foster youth on campus when over the summer I was able to meet older Guardian Scholars. It was really empowering to see that there were so many of us. I loved that some of them shared their reality with us and they taught me to embrace my reality as well.

After my first year of college, I went to visit my high school and the same staff member asked me if I was really attending SDSU, I smiled and said to him “Yes, just because I am a former foster youth that did not make me less intelligent or less capable to attend college.”

Statistics say:

Foster youth who experience more placements are nearly 15 percent less likely to complete high school when compared to their peers

• Only 50 percent will receive a high school diploma.
• Only 10 percent of former foster youth will attend college and, of that 10 percent, only 3 percent will graduate.
• 50 percent of former foster youth will be homeless during their first two years after exiting foster care.
• 60 percent of girls become pregnant within a few years after leaving the foster care system.
• 50 percent of youth leaving foster care are unemployed.

The SDSU Guardian Scholar program has helped me prove that I am not a statistic. There are other programs that help former foster youth here in San Diego. No one should limit themselves because they are afraid, or because people do not believe in them. We believe in you, Guardian Scholars believes in you, Just in Time believes in you, Promises 2 Kids believes in you. We all have been through experiences we did not think we would survive or experiences we did not want to live for. But we have brought ourselves this far into the world, and we can do so much more.

We have to be our own inspiration. All the Guardian Scholars and former foster youth I have encountered who have shared their stories with me are my inspiration. They have made me stronger. I wholeheartedly agree with a particular quote that says, “Do not let your struggle become your identity." Let your struggle be your inspiration to do so much better.

P.S.: Thank you, Josephine for all that you do for us, I know we are short staffed and we put a lot on you. Thank you for giving us this opportunity and loving us all. Thank you to Simone for helping Josephine. Thank you for being there when I needed someone to listen to me, helping me during my hard times. Thank You to Beth my EOP counselor for being amazing and helping me get my act together. Thank You to Danny for being a great counselor to myself and all other Guardian Scholars. We all know we need more staff because the program is growing so I thank you all for doing your best.