People make mistakes. YOU make mistakes. You're the strongest of the bunch to be able to proudly recognize mistakes in yourself and in others. You never feel ashamed to admit your wrongs and you pride yourself on that. You should. You find so much honor in people who can admit it to you themselves too because honesty is...beautiful. In the forgiving mind, honesty is everything.
You don't carry on in this world with a bitter heart towards those who have wronged you. You chose forgiveness because love is so much more important than that imperfect moment in them. You have so much faith in the good in the world that that moment is just in passing. It happened. They apologized. We carry on, right? What more can be done other than to forgive and move on? The quality of your life doesn't improve by holding grudges...
In the forgiving mind, everyone deserves forgiveness. There's good in every single soul on this Earth and every soul should be met with love and kindness in an effort to seek that.
But how do you know when it's too much? How do you know when your innocent intent and pursuit for everyone's health and well being is just... Too much..at what point do you become toxic to yourself?
Perhaps when you keep people in your life because an apology is ALWAYS enough. Perhaps when maintaining the peace is more important than Your mental and emotional health and you're so caught up in this mindset that you aren't even aware that a problem exists.
You get smaller to make those actions seem smaller, and then after enough practice, you become numb to it. Nothing is a big deal anymore. That routine of hurt becomes normal, and your routine of forgiving becomes a familiar and accepted part of you.
Instead, you do whatever you can to convince them you're not upset anymore, just so that they're feelings aren't hurt knowing that yours still are. Their feelings are more important than yours in those moments. You think you're strong enough to take it and Bury it so you never have to see it or feel it again, but you don't know if they are so you just sacrifice yourself for the person who got you here in the first place anyways.
That's when it's toxic...when you no longer know what's best for you.. when, for the sake of everyone else's peace, you sacrifice your own.
