Most people today know and love Pinterest, regarding it as the one place to find anything and everything needed in a moment's notice. Whether it be crafts, clothes, workouts, recipes, or relationships, Pinterest virtually has it all. Not only do people use the site for ideas and helpful tips, oftentimes teens and young adults use it for advice, and if not advice, as a way to idealize what they hope their lives will someday be like. However, and sorry to be a Pinterest party pooper here, I have found five out of millions of pins (and I'm sure there's more), that honestly aren't really that helpful in forming values of a successful relationship.

One of my best friends and I have found plenty of joy, sighs of anguish, and great bonding time when looking through Pinterest for wedding ideas and relationship things just for the fun of it, because we're girls and it makes us happy to dream. What I realized upon browsing through endless quotes about love, relationships, and marriage, however, is that many of the pins support a kind of love much reflecting the twisted culture of society today. Gone are the olden days of biblical love, the love of today has a different approach and I'd like to share a few of the quotes that struck me as being horribly wrong and not a goal the young women of today should aim for.

1. A loss of values for the sake of having a significant other.

What?! There is no way a relationship based off of this principle is healthy. You are worth it to wait until someone comes into your life who won't make you loosen your values for the sake of being with him. In fact, he should do just the opposite, solidifying your self-governing morals. "Where there is no vision, the people are unrestrained, But happy is he who keeps the law." Proverbs 29:18

2. Being unable to form personal goals beyond the relationship.

It is totally fine to desire a relationship with a specific person, as long as the feelings have a healthy base and span. What is not okay is being unable to see life outside of the relationship. I love my boyfriend don't get me wrong, but I certainly have my own dreams and goals for my life that have nothing to do with our relationship. As a young woman in the modern world, it upsets me that despite the millions of opportunities for women, many still turn to men for recognition, purpose, and worth. "But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you." Matthew 6:33

3. Differing your behavior and personality based on who you're with.

This one reminds me of the lyrics to a popular Taylor Swift song: "I'm only me when I'm with you". Either way it is said, it doesn't lessen the fact that the person in question acts like someone else when with their significant other. While being in a relationship should allow you to be yourself, it's important to be that same person in every area of your life. If not, who can say which one is the real you? Do you even know yourself? "If even lifeless instruments, such as the flute or the harp, do not give distinct notes, how will anyone know what is played?" 1 Corinthians 14:7

4. Being happy in an undefined relationship.

So many problems can arise when a relationship is undefined and one of the people involved isn't sure where he/she stands. In a healthy relationship, boundaries will be defined and both people will feel secure in their own right. If a mutual agreement about the relationship cannot be reached, it probably isn't meant to be. Stop placing yourself in distress and move on."Give to everyone what you owe them: If you owe taxes, pay taxes; if revenue, then revenue; if respect, then respect; if honor, then honor." Romans 13:7

5. Not having a self-sufficient life without the other.

Regardless of whether or not you remember it, you did have a life before that "someone," and depending on the person, you might have to have a life after as well. Being completely dependent on another person is bad for both people involved, and can end up hurting the relationship overall. A couple can enjoy being in each other's company without having to be together at all times."Not that we are sufficient in ourselves to claim anything as coming from us, but our sufficiency is from God." 2 Corinthians 3:5

Ultimately, relationship success is a gift from God, not the result of endless hours searching and idolizing on Pinterest. And while everyone, myself included, loves the warm fuzzy feeling that comes from reading quotes like these, it's important to hold them in a retrospective light. While in the midst of experiencing one of these so-called "Pinterest sessions" a guy friend of mine said something that really struck me: "Guys too like relationship goals, I just prefer to go out and actually try to achieve them rather than looking at them on a screen." I'll close with advice for myself, as well as all the other girls out there, both young and old; no matter how many hours are spent online planning and hoping for a model life, you will never be able to get there unless you turn off the screen, start praying, and work hard for what you want to achieve.