This year's election is radically different than the ones past because for once it is not simply a battle between similar politicians that seem to care more about politics and power than the people they represent. Having Donald Trump and Bernie Sanders in the mix brings a refreshing change of pace to the election, as we are presented candidates who might actually be on our side for once. It's just too bad one of them (cough cough, Trump) is the biggest idiot ever to walk the face of the earth. In case you don't believe me (you really should for the well being of our entire country and possibly the world), here's a list of the five dumbest things Trump has ever done.
1. Donald Trump personally witnessed thousands of Muslims cheering when the Twin Towers went down.
"It did happen. I saw it. It was on television. I saw it. There were people that were cheering on the other side of New Jersey, where you have large Arab populations. They were cheering as the World Trade Center came down.” - Donald Trump, Nov. 21 2015
Donald Trump somehow turned on his TV, a network one might say is rather popular among Americans, and witnessed a spectacle nobody but only Trump's perceptive mind alone could catch. Perhaps the rest of us blinked at the same time and missed the clip, or we simply did not have the sheer brain power that apparently Trump possesses and mistook a crowd of thousands of Muslims as under-dressed firemen. What I find to be the most likely explanation is Trump was too busy practicing his smirk in the TV screen to have any recollection of what he saw at all that day, panicked during the speech and made another racially offensive lie about the most relevant minority he could think of on the spot. Classic Trump.
2. China invented global warming. Nope this is real. Nope, he really said this. No really. Really.
Some people choose to claim that global warming isn't real, and while we generally applaud their example of how natural selection works and choose them as the first to be fed to the angry polar bears when all the glaciers melt a couple thousand years before they're supposed to, this is so dumb we cannot sit idly by. Why Trump? Explain this to us. China is leading the war against climate change with the strictest and most costly regulations in place. Someone explain to me how this make sense.
3. That one time Trump tweeted a picture of what he thought were American soldiers, and turned out to be Nazi soldiers. Brilliant call Trump.
As a potential future president, you would think that Trump would check where his backgrounds were coming from and whether or not they were patriotic American soldiers or, say, an army that enforced the genocide of 11 million Jews. I would normally say something scathing about Trump, but his popularity after this tweet somehow rose to the top of the Republican party, so I mean, c'mon America. Let's get our sh*t together.
4. Vaccinations lead to autism, because a fake article by a discredited author said so.
"Autism has become an epidemic. Twenty-five years ago, 35 years ago, you look at the statistics, not even close. It has gotten totally out of control," Trump said. "I am totally in favor of vaccines. But I want smaller doses over a longer period of time. Same exact amount, but you take this little beautiful baby, and you pump—I mean, it looks just like it's meant for a horse, not for a child, and we've had so many instances, people that work for me." The Slate, 2015
Oh, Trump—76 percent of everything that comes out of your mouth being lies is bad enough, but at least one of the four times you have ever thought you were telling the truth (even if what you thought was the truth was drastically inaccurate), you might have at least checked to make sure the source you were citing wasn't written by a discredited author no longer allowed to practice medicine in the U.K. Due to an entirely inaccurate and fake study now labelled, and I quote, "an elaborate fraud" claiming a 2-year-old got autism from vaccinations, Trump advocated for the cease of massive vaccinations. Ingeniously put, Trump informed society that "tiny children aren't horses," immediately convincing all of America and medical society of his argument with the one of the only four true things that has ever come out of Trump's mouth. No, Trump, tiny children are not horses. Well done.
5. Accounting is only for a certain race?
“Black guys counting my money! I hate it. The only kind of people I want counting my money are short guys that wear yarmulkes every day.” - New York Times, 1991.
Not really sure where to put this, Trump. Probably in box with all the other inappropriate and mind-bogglingly racist quotes you have let slip throughout the years. Your brain sometimes seems as small as your tiny, T-Rex sized hands.
