America is a melting pot of different cultures. It's a country built up by people who came here looking for a better life, people who left everything they knew to start again, learning a new language, fitting into a new culture, a new economy. For me, my ancestors came to America from Italy, places like Bonefro, Campobasso. Back then, Italian immigrants were treated incredibly poorly. They wouldn't get hired because their surnames ended in vowels. Their accents and poor English language skills marked them as targets, like it did for Nicola Sacco and Bartolomeo Vanzetti, two Italian immigrants widely believed to be wrongly tried and convicted on the count of first-degree murder back in the 1920s. Many Italians in the States changed their last names so as to try and hide their heritage so they could just get a job.
Although we've managed to come a long way from the awful mistreatment of Italians right after the first few waves of immigration, the definition of what it means to be an Italian-American has developed into a caricature, a stereotypical image of what it really means. Here are some Italian-American stereotypes debunked.
1. "Oh, so you're in the mafia?"
This is probably the biggest stereotype ever, and the most common one I hear when I tell someone I'm Italian. American media and pop culture has romanticized something that has been a darker part of Italian history and culture. It does exist, but being Italian doesn't automatically mean you're involved with it.
2. "Why aren't you tan?"
God, Karen, you can't just ask someone why they aren't tan. Yes, there are Italians with tan skin and dark hair and eyes, but not the ancestors from whom I got my genes. I've got some northerner in me, so my skin is pale and my hair is brown and my eyes are green. That doesn't make me any less Italian.
3. "So are you really loud all the time?"
Not all Italians are loud and outgoing. Just like with any kind of people, there are introverts and extroverts and ambiverts. I can be loud and outgoing, but I can also keep to myself. It depends on the day and my mood.
4. "Do you eat pasta for, like, every meal?"
Do you know how many carbs that would be? While pasta is an important part of the Italian cuisine, that doesn't mean it's eaten 24/7. We have it every now and then and eat it during Sunday dinners with family, but my diet consists of more things than just spaghetti and meatballs. And you can bet that when we do have it, it's with homemade gravy and not sauce from a can.
5. "Are you all like those guys from Jersey Shore?"
Most of them aren't even Italian! Or from New Jersey! We're not all "guidos," which is actually a derogatory slang word for an Italian-American, and we certainly put emphasis on things in our life that aren't about going to the gym, tanning, and doing laundry. We care about more than our looks, and we don't party constantly.
Now that I've addressed some stereotypes of Italian-Americans, let me tell you what it's really like. We care about family. They're what's most important because when friends come and go, your family is always there for you through thick and thin. They'll call you out when you mess up and be there to pick you up again. They're there through the highs and lows, at your best and worst. We care about where we come from. Italy has a rich and unique culture, and that matters to us. Connecting with our roots, discovering new things about our past, someday returning to the country from where our ancestors came.
We're people, we're human. We hold on closely to our traditions, our roots. I cook with my grandmother and sing "Tanti Auguri a Te" to my great-grandmother on her birthday. My aunt wishes me a buon onomastico, and (although we don't eat it all the time) there's always lasagna at Easter dinner. I'm proud to be a third-generation Italian-American.
