FInding Your Confidence, Again
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Health and Wellness

FInding Your Confidence, Again

"Nothing can dim the light that shines from within." — Maya Angelou

FInding Your Confidence, Again
Jordan Donaldson

Body-shaming, negativity, and bullying are just three examples of what it takes to destroy someone's confidence. How do you learn to get back up and show the world that you aren't going to let them bring you down? Hopefully you wear a size 9.5, because, hunny, you are about to take a walk in my shoes.

For those of you who have been with me since my first article, you have already been with me during my coming out experience. There are several things before this occurred that were enough to completely obliterate my confidence levels to being one who lost her personal identity.

By the time I left my ex-husband, I had four kids and no motivation. I worked and came home; I was damaged, and at times, I still am.

Don't get me wrong, I am happy that I am able to be myself, but I wish that I could have gotten to this point without dealing with physical and emotional abuses. It's damaged me and at times I get extremely angry that I relive the moments, however, I am coping. I am getting there.

Upon joining the world of the Single Life, I had endured being with an alcoholic, I survived being choked out, I survived having a gun pulled on me, and I saved him from pulling the trigger on himself. I survived the emotional slurs that were forming from his mouth.

What died that final night was my confidence.

I didn't feel stable.

I didn't feel beautiful.

What I did was started modeling as part of a hobby. I didn't think that I could accomplish that, but once I saw myself in print, it hit me. I felt amazing like I could conquer the world.

Until that one fateful day...I went to a shoot alone, which I normally wouldn't do, and when my stomach told me no, my brain convinced me yes.

I got to the shoot and the photographer belittled me when I refused him sex.

Thus breaking my confidence once more.

One day I woke up, looked at myself in the mirror and said to myself (and days following it really stuck with me),

"Fuck what everyone else says. I am me, no one can change that. I am beautiful in my own skin and no one can tell me otherwise. I am me."

The crazy thing about this is that it is true, and it worked.

I am my own kind of beautiful, just like you are your own kind of beautiful.

We all endure hardships that bring us down, but the important thing is bringing ourselves back up and putting our middle fingers to the world.

Don't give others the power to destroy you, it gives them exactly what they are looking for.

Psst...Hey you, yes you reading this. You are beautiful and strong and I can see your confidence, let it free.

"Nothing can dim the light that shines from within."

— Maya Angelou

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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