Adjusting to college life is not always as easy as everyone makes it seem. Some people have a harder time making friends and finding out where they fit in. This can be very discouraging, and often times the reason why people transfer after their first or second year.
I was one of those people. One of those people who questioned whether or not my dream school was actually my dream school. As someone who is very shy and cautious about everything, college was already one of my biggest nightmares. Just being away from home and the people that I knew the best was enough to keep me up at night worrying about the experiences that I would have.
The first semester of my freshman year could not have gone worse. I was never alone, living in a suite with eight other girls, and being one of 40 on my floor, but I always felt lonely. I had the hardest time connecting with the people that I was around, and even when I reached out to people beyond my dorm, I still was not finding those meaningful connections that I had left behind at home. This caused me to put my guard up even more. As the year progressed, I just found comfort in my work. I would do everything by myself for the most part, spending almost seven hours in the library after class, and only going to events where someone else would speak, and all I would have to do was listen. I was content, but I was not happy. I was doing the bare minimum to get through the week so that I could go home on the weekends, and to get through the school year so that I would be able to start fresh when fall came around.
As the months drew closer to August, I started to lose my sense of optimism for my sophomore year. I became anxious all over again just thinking about the friends that I would not make, and the opportunities that I would miss out on because I was too afraid of facing the same rejection over and over again. This may sound over dramatic, but when you are a person who has struggled to make friends their entire life, rejection does not get easier, it only gets worse. It really makes you question the kind of person that you are, and causes you to wonder about all of the things that people wish to change about you to make you a more desirable person to be around. It really hurts, and it is a real dent to one's self confidence.
The first semester of my sophomore year came, and it was slightly better, but I still was not having the same "Elon experience" that everyone raves about. I became even more discouraged, to the point that I was ready to leave school and start taking online classes. The one thing that got me to stay was the fact that Elon is known for its prestigious communications program. I was originally a communications minor, so I decided to take an introductory communications class which I happened to love; so much so, that I signed up for three more communications classes for the winter and spring semesters.
During winter term, I took a media writing class and absolutely loved it. I had spoken with my professor about my interest in journalism, and potentially editing, and he referred me to the "Elon News Network", Elon's student-run news organization. I went to my first meeting and was assigned my first article at the start of February. For the first time, I felt like I actually had a purpose, and that I belonged at Elon. Shortly afterwards, I applied for a copy editing position so that I could further my involvement with the organization. Last week, I was notified that I had been offered the position. I could not be more excited for this new opportunity, and I cannot wait to see where it takes me. Not only has my involvement within the student news organization grown, but I have also joined a few more on-campus organizations such as "She Can Lead", a club that focuses on provided people with the confidence to assume leadership roles, and to eliminate stereotypes that are made about women and their capabilities.
My purpose for writing this is to encourage those who may feel out of place at their school. It may take a while, but by continuing to join new organizations, reach out to people, and going to extra educational opportunities, you are bound to see a change in your experience. Do not let a couple of setbacks keep you from enjoying a place that you worked so hard to attend. You are at your school for a reason; do not lose hope, keep searching, and you are guaranteed to find it.
"Be brave. Take risks. Nothing can substitute experience."
