A 23 year old soldier enters a restaurant, tired from a long weekend at drill, waits to be seated and then plops into a booth the waitress guides him to. He sighs heavily, while he scans the menu. The waitress asks if she can bring him anything to drink, hurrying to the next table as soon as he indicates that he wants a coffee, black. He sits, overwhelmed from the transition and bustle back to civilian life. He orders his food, eats, pays, and not a single person stops for a conversation, much less a genuine “Thank you for your service.”

Why is it that so many men and women go unnoticed, underappreciated, and are pitied instead of praised? An excellent and concise article written by Amy Bushatz gives a few tips for the general public to say something or do something meaningful for those who serve our country.

Before listing any tips though, Bushatz paints a picture of what it looks like for her to plan times to go out with her husband when he’s still in uniform, in hopes that someone will thank him for the time he’s put into fighting for freedom. She mentions that it’s one of the sweetest things when little children race up to her husband, eyes glowing with wonder, mesmerized at the novelty of being a soldier, a hero.

Bushatz understands it can be challenging at times to find the right words or know how to thank a servicemember. She is quoted as saying, “... I wonder if poorly expressed thanks (or no thanks at all) is at least partially due to lack of knowledge” (military.com, 2014). I’m personally grateful for the author of this article taking time to help civilians figure out the simple words to say and actions that mean so much to our service men and women.

So let’s get started! First of all, if you see someone who is dressed in military uniform, just stop them and give an authentic “thank you!” No need to express pity or tell them you are sorry for them. Bushatz says “[they] chose this life and are happy to serve.” Stick to encouraging words that express thankfulness and gratitude.

Next, more specifically to business owners, if you offer a military discount for merchandise or any other services you offer - make it visible, don’t leave it hidden. The author suggests “Consider posting a sign. Not only will you be spreading the appreciation and love, but more military members will have a chance to find out about the discount and use it” (military.com, 2014).

A third thought that Bushatz had shared was to honestly just help out the spouse of a deployed military member. Maybe offering to watch the kids while they get some errands done or a workout in. If you notice the grass is looking a little unruly, ask if you can tame the lawn for them. There’s always things that can be done to exemplify love, care and gratitude. Small things go a long way.

I’d say taking time to offer a handshake and a thank you, a high-five and a smile of gratitude, or some other similar kind gesture could really show our thankfulness. Remember that those who have served, are currently serving, or are getting trained in order to serve in the future have made a choice as well as a commitment. We, as civilians, should make it a priority to thank someone in uniform whenever we see them. Go out of our way to let them know they are appreciated and that we care about the job they have selected to dedicate their lives to.

What will you do? Will you just read this and move on? Or will you take action and decide to start thanking people who risk their lives, sacrifice their time and their families, and deal with many unsaid difficulties? I promise not a single soldier, marine, or airman will ever be hurt if you stop and say thank you. In fact, it may just brighten up their day.

*This article was adapted from military.com thanks to Amy Bushatz for her original article!