Finding Love in 2019 is a Difficult Feat

Finding Love in 2019 is a Difficult Feat

Not trying to sound cliche, but for real where did it all go?

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This generation has become so dry lately. We prefer to use texting rather than seeing people face to face. We solve our conflicts by texting about it rather than having a real conversation with each other. Dating apps have become the norm for meeting significant others, scratch that, I mean people to "hang out" with.

We aren't in tact with our emotions, but rather just fake it. We fake things that shouldn't ever be faked. We pretend to feel something when in reality we don't feel a thing.

Where did the love go?

Where did those friday date nights that I constantly hear older generations reminiscing about go? Why can't we go back to that time?

I don't fully understand to this day why "Netflix and Chill" has become the new norm for our generation instead of going to the movies or even just a cheap dinner date.

We've lost the love somewhere along the way. Somewhere we stopped caring about getting to know each other but rather just jump into things that at the end of the day just leave you feeling more lonely than you ever did before.

We need to calm down a bit. This generation needs to realize that this is not how its suppose to be or should be. You're not too busy to date, you just are looking in the wrong places for the wrong thing. You shouldn't be looking for just a good time or even be looking on apps for anything relationship wise.

These things take time. You don't just fall in love with someone after one meet and you don't just into a relationship after a week of knowing someone.

It takes time and patience. Everyone will find the person for them but the way this generation is going, it'll probably take way longer.

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An Open Letter To My Long Distance Boyfriend

The miles between us may be hard, but being with you is so worth it.
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Dear ____,

At the moment, you and I are in two separate places. And I can't even begin to tell you how much I wish I could be right by your side. But I will be soon.

I know that it is very, very hard dating me from so far away. Certain days, things may seem impossible. But there are a few things I want you to know and understand when things get difficult.

First, I want you to always remember how much I care about you. Despite the miles between us, I will never stop asking you how your day is, spontaneously calling you when I know you are having a rough day, or simply sending you a nice text message to brighten your day. Your happiness means everything to me. No matter how far away I am, you are always on my mind. I always want you to be having a fantastic day, enjoying yourself, and making memories.

I wish I could be there with you each day to experience all the good things. I wish I could sit across from you at the dinner table, greet you when you get home from work, and go out to do fun things with you every weekend. But I can't. At least not right now. And I wish I could.

Second, I want you to realize how hard for me it truly is being away from you. When something good happens, you are the first person I want to tell. Sure, you may only be a phone call away, but it's not the same as being with you and celebrating in person. When I'm having a bad day, you are the one I want by my side, hugging me tight, telling me that everything is going to be okay.

Third, please know and understand that I am loyal to you. So many long distance relationships end because someone decides to be unfaithful. I would never do that to you. You are the one for me, and nobody else even catches my attention. Nobody here compares to you. I want you, and nobody else. So even with these miles between us, I will always be faithful to you. Just as I always know that you will be to me.

Fourth, and finally, I want you to know that despite the hard times and missing each other like crazy, it is worth it. I may see you less than I wish. But when I do get to see you, my heart is filled with pure joy. I practically count down the days until I get to see you. The moment I lay eyes on you after our time apart, and I see your smile and eyes I love so much looking at me, at that moment, I am reminded how worth it our long distance relationship is.

I would rather spend time away from you and be able to still laugh with you, see you when I can, and live a happy life with you, than not see you at all. You add a happiness to my life that I could never know without you. One day, when there is no longer distance between us and we can permanently be together, we will look back at this part of our lives and be glad that we went through this together. Because the prize in the end, having you, is oh so worth it.

I'll see you soon, and I can't wait.

Sincerely,

The woman who loves you, even from miles and miles away.



Cover Image Credit: boredpanda.com

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5 Reasons Why I Don't Want Kids

Procreating. It's not for everyone.

dambro64
dambro64
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My cousin had a baby last August. She's absolutely beautiful and I love her to death, but she doesn't change my mind when it comes to wanting kids when I'm older. Truth is, I don't want kids. I'm sure everyone says this at some point in their life, and maybe I will change my mind in the future, but kids kind of freak me out.

Maybe I'm just not the most maternal person, but here's why having kids, at least for now, isn't on my bucket list.

1. Giving birth.

I know, I know, it's a beautiful thing, the miracle of life or whatever, but go watch a birthing video and then come tell me how beautiful it really is. Everything from a woman's water breaking, to actually giving birth just grosses me out, to be honest.

The thought of having to push something the size of a watermelon out of something the size of a lemon is just absolutely terrifying. I have a pretty average to above average pain tolerance, but no matter how well you can deal with pain, that shit is obviously not a pleasant experience.

2. The responsibility.

You have to do everything for babies, literally everything. Feed it, dress it, wash it, change it, put it to sleep, and you have to know what a baby wants when it wants it. If I had a baby and it started to cry, I would have no idea what to do. I know plenty of people say that once you have the baby, you automatically know which type of crying is for what need, but that makes no sense to me.

Do babies have different types of cries? How do you know which is which?

I consider myself a pretty responsible person when it comes time to be accountable for myself, but to be accountable for another life form?

I'll put it this way. I have two pet turtles. We got them when I was about twelve or so years old, and I remember being obsessed with them. That lasted for like maybe two weeks, and then I got bored with them, which meant I didn't take care of them. My parents did. Not the best analogy for obvious reasons, but I'm sure you understand what I'm trying to say. In other words, if I can barely take care of a pet, how would I ever be able to take care of a small human?

3. Kids are messy and loud.

Look, I'm not like a total clean freak or anything like that, but my mother definitely is. She used to disinfect sticks so my sister and I could roast marshmallows when we went camping for Girl Scouts. My point is, it's been drilled into my brain that everything has to be wiped down clean, and germs are not my friends.

I hate being around sick people; they freak me out, especially since I get sick so easily. If my baby or child were to get sick, I'd obviously still have to take care of it, which means wiping snot, cleaning vomit, and getting coughed on. I guarantee you, as soon as my child were to get better, I'd get sick.

Don't even get me started on changing dirty diapers.

Also, if there's anything I've learned from my cousin's baby thus far, it's that babies put everything in their mouths. Any object on the ground, their hands, and feet; nothing is safe. Babies don't understand sanitation, so it's not their fault, but I just know that if I had a kid, it would be in a plastic bubble so it could remain as clean as possible.

Babies are also very loud. Back when I worked at a diner, we used to have customers with little kids and babies all the time. If the kid was unhappy for any reason, that child would scream its head off. I never understood how such a big noise could come from such a small human.

4. Kids are expensive AF.

Kids are not cheap. They have an entire laundry list of stuff that needs to be bought for them, and they run out of supplies frequently. I can't imagine how much money people spend on things like diapers, formula, and clothes. Speaking of clothes, babies grow out things quickly. You get one or two good uses of an outfit and that's it. They outgrow it, and they can no longer use it.

Then, as they get older, you've got to think about school, eventually college, and extracurricular activities that they want to do, gifts for Christmas and other holidays. I say all of this, realizing how much my own parents have spent on me and my siblings (thanks, Mom and Dad).

5. Raising kids looks hard.

Knowing how much my sisters and I were pains in the asses for my parents, I can't imagine having to deal with that crap myself. The whole idea of shaping a child into a fully functioning member of society with good morals and conscience sounds like a lot of work.

There have been so many times where I would be at work and I'd have to deal with customers that have their kids with them, and these children are the biggest brats I've ever seen. Rude, disrespectful, obnoxious or disruptive; just the opposite of how kids should act in any public setting.

A big part of the reason I wouldn't want kids is that I see other people's kids and the way they act. It makes me just want to yell at the parents. At least I know that if I do ever decide to have kids, they'll be raised the way I want them to be and they'll behave the way they're supposed to. Appropriately.

In the big picture of things, whether or not you want kids is up to you. It's not meant for everyone and that's not the end of the world. I always get told that I don't mean it when I say I don't want kids, which isn't that big of a deal, but it can get annoying. In my opinion, if a person says they don't want kids, it's not because they think kids are like some evil being or anything like that. It's because they know their limits.

Growing a family is an amazing thing, but it's also different for everyone. No one should be judged for not liking or wanting to have kids. Everyone has different opinions. This one is just mine.

dambro64
dambro64

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