As a child, I can remember watching TV and seeing picture perfect couples and their families and thinking that one day I would have that. Not to mention that I was raised in a family with parents who fell more in love with each other every single day. It seems to me that society imprints this image on us of how life should be, suggesting that if you aren’t in a picture perfect relationship, you can’t be happy. As I got older, I came to realize that this wasn’t necessarily true, and it may have been one of the most important lessons that I ever learned.
Growing up, I continued to have this idea in my mind of how relationships should be, and how wonderful it would be to have a person to share my life with. I eagerly awaited the day that I could start dating. In all honesty, I think I was born a hopeless romantic. But as I started going through high school, the mold of how things should be started to crack. While all of my friends began dating and entering serious relationships, I was always the one who was single. For a while it bothered me, and I was happy for them, yet sad because I so badly wanted to experience the same thing.
Through this experience, I learned something very important. I learned how to be happy on my own, and how to be content with my life without being in a relationship, and I also learned that you have to be happy on your own before being with someone. I filled my life with things that made me happy, I surrounded myself with people who made me feel loved, and I learned to choose joy every single day. I’ve been in a few relationships in my life, some good, some not so good. I have experienced unreciprocated feelings on both ends of the spectrum, and I’ve been heartbroken several times. But through it all, I’ve learned that fulfillment doesn’t come from being with someone, but rather from inner contentment. If you’re happy with life, then everything else will fall into place. You should be happy enough that when the right person comes along, they don’t supply your happiness but rather they add to it.
With all of this being said, I’m not trying to say that we can spend the rest of our lives alone and be happy, because I don’t believe that to be true either. We are interdependent by nature, and we need people to be fulfilled. What I’m trying to say is that being in a relationship shouldn’t define your happiness. You don’t always have to have a significant other in order to feel like your life has meaning. Find your purpose, discover your own version of happy, and when the time is right, everything else will fall In to place. Most of the things I know about life I’ve learned from my favorite movie, He’s Just Not That Into You. At the end, the main character states, “And maybe a happy ending doesn't include a guy, maybe... it's you, on your own, picking up the pieces and starting over, freeing yourself up for something better in the future.” This is beyond true. The best advice I could give you is to find your own happy ending, and when the time is right, your fairytale will come along, and make your happy ending even happier.
