Before reading the rest of this article, I suggest you take the Enneagram test to see which number you are.
My freshman year of college, I got into an interesting conversation with one of my friends. She suggested I take the enneagram test to see which "number" I was. Basically, the enneagram is a fancy personality test that explores the unique attributes and characteristics of each person. I find it helpful because knowing someone's number really helps me cater to the different things that make them happy or comfortable. For example, as a 4 Wing 3, I'm what's known as the "romantic," or "individualist." The "wing 3" means I'm also the "achiever." Since I'm classified as a 4, I have a tendency to romanticize everything in my life. Knowing this about myself has helped me take a more realistic view of the world.
Everyone falls into one of these number categories, but their "wings" vary, which provides humanity with so much variety and uniqueness. That being said, some numbers are better at getting along with each other than others. Of course, there are exceptions to every rule, but here is a cheat-sheet for the most romantic heterosexual combinations:
Type 1 Female (Perfectionist) with Type 9 Male (Peacemaker)
Think Rory and Dean from Gilmore Girls. These two types go well together because they both cause each other to be more introspective. The peacemakers tend to be selfless and helpful, which usually pushes type 1 females to act more selflessly as well. Ones usually bring logic and rationality, while 9s are gentle and accepting. This attribute calms the internal perfectionism that usually haunts type ones... especially the females. The saying "you're your own worst critic" is especially true when it comes to type ones. Nines possess a rare gift of encouragement, so their gentle compliments soften 1s, while the ones provide logic and direction to 9s.
Type 2 Female (Helper) with Type 8 Male (Challenger/Leader)
Type 2s are either naturally very generous and helpful, or their self-worth comes from their belief that they are helpful. Type 8s are unapologetic when it comes to taking control, even if it means fighting against other authority figures. Although these types appear to be opposites, both tend to be sentimental and deeply sensitive, though they try to hide it by being overly selfless or overly controlling. When they're unhealthy, 2s and 8s are often possessive of others and within relationships. Therefore, they can make a fiercely loyal and powerful couple. However, typically, 2s are focused on the comfort and happiness of others while 8s are focused on their own power and well-being. When 8s are healthy, or in love, their own protective nature can act as a safety for 2s. Eights are also better at being objective and helping 2s to consider their own health in addition to the health of others. Twos help 8s think outside of themselves.
Type 3 Female (Achiever) with Type 1 Male (Perfectionist)
Remember the show "Wipe Out"? During one season, they had "power couples" come on and compete together. When you think of type 3s and 1s together, imagine those couples. These are the type of people who compete in CrossFit together and take hours to meal-prep each week. This pairing is somewhat unimaginable for me, since both type 3s and type 1s tend to be intense and overly focused on results, even if their goals are unnecessary or unrealistic. Usually opposites attract, but in this case, the partners are both extremely driven and feed the other's fire with self-discipline and a lot of success. Some blind spots in this relationship may be a lack of emotional awareness, cutting corners morally, and not owning up to one's mistakes.
Type 4 Female (Romantic/Individualist) with Type 9 (Peacemaker) or Type 8 Male (Challenger)
The most successful relationships for fours are often with a type 9 or a type 8. With a type 4 and type 9 couple, the 4s often bring color and creativity to the 9s, who are also artistic. The 9s are good at listening to the 4's drama without getting overly involved or emotional. Nines are also good at complimenting and reassuring 4s, who typically assume that they are defective or unlovable in some way. Fours help 9s to admit their suppressed feelings, and 9s struggle to be honest about their feelings since nines tend to bury their feelings.
Type 5 Female (Thinker) with Type 1 Male (Perfectionist)
The thinkers are typically withdrawn and introverted. Imagine a female engineer with the CEO of a large company. Both are driven and intelligent. The type 5s bring awareness and quiet to the lives of the driven, more social ones. The 1s draw the 5s out of their shell and can prove to be very encouraging when they're healthy.
Type 6 Female (Loyalist) with Type 8 (Challenger) or Type 9 Male (Peacemaker)
Type 6s are extremely faithful to their partners. That being said, they're willing to submit to a leader, like a type 8, or a more peaceful, dominant personality, like a type 9. Type 8s bring 6s a sense of stability and protection, while type 9s reassure them with words. Sixes are fiercely loyal, so they provide their significant others with stability as well.
Type 7 Female (Enthusiast) with Type 5 (Thinker) or Type 1 Male (Perfectionist)
The enthusiasts always have the spotlight at parties, and they're always ready for the next adventure. When paired with a thinker, they help to draw the 5s out of their antisocial atmosphere. Type 5s help 7s to slow down and enjoy the beauty in logic. Type 1s help sevens to be more aware of rules and regulations, while 7s bring more freedom to the life of a perfectionist. Because each of these pairs is so opposite, it's a lot easier to imagine and observe.
Type 8 Female (Leader/Challenger) with Type 9 Male (Peacemaker)
In this case, the woman is more of a leader, so she needs someone who will provide stability and support. The 9s are perfect for this, since they bring a quiet leadership and a calming presence. The 8 will help them with their obsessive nature and the 9s will help the 8s to be gentler.
Type 9 Female (Peacemaker) with Type 6 Male (Loyalist)
The female 9s are usually prone to a more quiet, intuitive nature, which intensely attracts male 6s, who are looking for someone to help protect by being faithful. The 9s help the 6s with their more anxious nature by gently reassuring them and being available for quality time. However, 9s often struggle with a sort of depression if their family or friends are experiencing conflict, so the 6s reassure them by always being there.
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