It is so hard to remind yourself you are the most important thing in your life. Yes, it is key to be selfless from time to time and do good things for others. You shouldn't be some self-absorbed narcissist who only cares about their own needs and wants. But in no way does that mean that you should forget about making yourself happy, heard, and fully satisfied with how you lead your life. I have learned to slowly clear out all the negative people in my life because I want what makes me happy.
I have always had a hard time sticking up for myself. I never really wanted to hurt anyone or cause any waves among my friends or the relationships I had with them. I would let people talk down to me or say mean things behind my back without confrontation. I'd let people say rude comments to my face and generally just let it go. I don't know why exactly, I guess that was how I used to think, but then I found my voice.
I realized that I can speak up for myself and that I can't please everyone that comes in my path if it is what stops me from being me. I am a strong person, with the right to feel loved and appreciated always. I don't need negative people in my life if it means I am going to suffer in the long run. I can speak up for myself and make myself happy, and people will, in turn, realize it's not ‘cool' to poke fun, bad mouth, or talk down about someone.
I don't deserve to be the punch-line of your joke or your personal servant. I am my own person, I can and deserve to be happy.
I'm not generalizing and saying everyone around me is a bunch of crude individuals that are terrible to me. That would just be lying. I have just learned to weed out those who are not worth me trying to please or yearn for their friendship if they are just going to be rude in return.
My friend Danielle put it into perspective, "Why would you waste your time on someone who won't waste their time on you?" That stuck with me and I have sought to live by it ever since.
I promise, if you focus on yourself and what makes you feel empowered, loved, appreciated, energetic, you will live a happier life. Find your voice. Speak up for yourself. Clear out the bad vibes from your social circle. If these people really wanted to be your friend, they will realize that how their actions lead you to want nothing of it.
Love yourself, and you will find yourself a happier human.
