How To Find The PERFECT College Roommate Your Freshman Year

How To Find The PERFECT College Roommate Your Freshman Year

Find someone who will you keep you sane rather than drive you insane!
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Freshman year of college. Okay, it’s already difficult enough that you’re moving out of your home and leaving people you have been with your whole life but now you have to move in with someone you barely know anything about? You have to learn their schedules and pet-peeves and all the other ins and outs of their lives. But, also keep in mind that your college roommate does not have to be your best friend, most likely they won't be. You will most likely be so nervous you won’t even remember your own. So, allow me to just help you out… since I have been in your shoes before.

1. Don’t be too straight forward

Okay, I know you really want to find a roommate so you don’t have to worry about it anymore but I highly suggest not just messaging a random person and asking to be their roommate off the get-go. Why? Well, you definitely need time to get to know them because you will spend a decent chunk a time with this person. Connecting with this person and having similar interests is extremely important. By similar interests I mean both liking sports, music, having the same major, etc.

2. Don’t be too open minded

Being judgmental is completely okay when looking for a future roommate. Going through their posts helps you see what they are all about and also what all their friends from home are all about. If they only seem to party and you intend to spend a lot of your time studying and stay in, they probably are not the one for you. Yes, it is important to go out of your comfort zone in college but I would be careful to not stray too far away when looking for who you will be living with. If you feel like something is a red flag, they are a no go.

3. Don’t live with someone you are going to be with all the time

This is easily one of the most important rules when finding your roommate. Don’t room with someone just because they are doing the same activities as you. (Sports, band, clubs, etc.) One reason is because if you are living with someone that you are with not only inside the room, but also outside you are bound to get sick of each other and fight. Also, having a roommate involved in separate things throughout campus could help you get involved in new things!

4. Meet up with them before you officially decide to live together

Okay, meet up with your potential future roommate before deciding to make sure they exist. (hahaha, jk… kinda) But seriously, you really can’t judge someone's character until you are face to face with them. Yes, it may be awkward but it’s better to be awkward now than when you move-in to school. Also, make sure you know the difference between awkward and uncomfortable because if you are uncomfortable with them, you don’t want to live with them for a year. You do this before committing because you can still back out if you aren’t all about living with them.

5. Talk about your sleeping habits

If you guys are anything like me, this is an important one. I like to get at least one nap in a day and that normally occurs right after my classes so when I wake up from my nap I have a tendency to do homework until 1 or 2 in the morning. To some people this could be a problem. I have plenty of college friends who try to be in bed by 10 or 11 and I know that they would be extremely upset if their roommate was up all night with the lights on or banging around keeping them awake. My roommate and I have the same schedule in this sense and honestly I believe it really helps both of us out.

6. Tell the truth

There is no reason to lie to someone when you possibly will be living with them. They are going to figure out all of your flaws and basically everything there is to know about so there is absolutely no need to lie to try to impress them. If you are a messy person, don’t tell them you always have your room cleaned. Also, if you have a significant other or close friends that plans to come up often, PLEASE tell them. Being honest with them will not only help them decide if they want to live with you but it will also cause them to be honest back so you know if you would do well living with them.

7. Don't live with someone you went to high school with

Of course, stay friends with the people you went to high school with but I highly suggest not living with them if you plan to attend the same college. College is new, it should not be a carried on version of your high school life. It is a time for you to make new friends and try new things but if you are hanging around your room with an old high school buddy you probably won't be putting yourself out there as much. Also, it is easier to get into arguments because you have been together much, much longer. {BUT, this is just my opinion}

I have no doubts that you have heard plenty of roommate horror stories and to be honest, most of them are probably true. Please, please remember that while you are in search of your first college roommate that this is not a process to take lightly. This person has the power to make or break your first year of college and they could even have the power to make you want to transfer. This person is also going to be the face you see after a really bad or good day, they will be the person who can identify if something is wrong with you before anyone else, they will see you at your weirdest, darkest and happiest moments and they will be the one who wipes your tears and offers open arms whenever you need… so pick wisely.

And to be honest, I can’t guarantee that you will find your perfect match by following these tips but I can tell you that you will at least have a good story to tell that than a horror story.

……Good Luck!

Cover Image Credit: Emily Marcus

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To The Girl Who Had A Plan

A letter to the girl whose life is not going according to her plan.
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“I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul.” - William Ernest Henley

Since we were little girls we have been asked, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” We responded with astronauts, teachers, presidents, nurses, etc. Then we start growing up, and our plans change.

In middle school, our plans were molded based on our friends and whatever was cool at the time. Eventually, we went to high school and this question became serious, along with some others: “What are your plans for college?” “What are you going to major in?” “When do you think you’ll get married?” “Are you going to stay friends with your friends?” We are bombarded with these questions we are supposed to have answers to, so we start making plans.

Plans, like going to college with our best friends and getting a degree we’ve been dreaming about. Plans, to get married as soon as we can. We make plans for how to lose weight and get healthy. We make plans for our weddings and children.

SEE ALSO: 19 Pieces Of Advice From A Soon-To-Be 20-Year-Old

We fill our Pinterest boards with these dreams and hopes that we have, which are really great things to do, but what happens when you don’t get into that college? What happens when your best friend chooses to go somewhere else? Or, what if you don’t get the scholarship you need or the awards you thought you deserved. Maybe, the guy you thought you would marry breaks your heart. You might gain a few pounds instead of losing them. Your parents get divorced. Someone you love gets cancer. You don’t get the grades you need. You don’t make that collegiate sports team. The sorority you’re a legacy to, drops you. You didn’t get the job or internship you applied for. What happens to you when this plan doesn’t go your way?

I’ve been there.

The answer for that is “I have this hope that is an anchor for my soul.” Soon we all realize we are not the captain of our fate. We don’t have everything under control nor will we ever have control of every situation in our lives. But, there is someone who is working all things together for the good of those who love him, who has a plan and a purpose for the lives of his children. His name is Jesus. When life takes a turn you aren’t expecting, those are the times you have to cling to Him the tightest, trusting that His plan is what is best. That is easier said than done, but keep pursuing Him. I have found in my life that His plans were always better than mine, and slowly He’s revealing that to me.

The end of your plan isn’t the end of your life. There is more out there. You may not be the captain of your fate, but you can be the master of your soul. You can choose to be happy despite your circumstances. You can change directions at any point and go a different way. You can take the bad and make something beautiful out of it, if you allow God to work in your heart.

SEE ALSO: To The Girl Patiently Waiting With An Impatient Heart

So, make the best of that school you did get in to. Own it. Make new friends- you may find they are better than the old ones. Apply for more scholarships, or get a job. Move on from the guy that broke your heart; he does not deserve you. God has a guy lined up for you who will love you completely. Spend all the time you can with the loved one with cancer. Pray, pray hard for healing. Study more. Apply for more jobs, or try to spend your summer serving others instead. Join a different club or get involved in other organizations on campus. Find your delight first in God and then pursue other activities that make you happy; He will give you the desires of your heart.

My friend, it is going to be OK.

Cover Image Credit: Megan Beavers Photography

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Fall In Love With Failure In Order To Be Successful

Make failure your key to success.

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The world is full of 'no's.' From your parents saying no to you not being able to go out with your friends, to getting denied from the college you really wanted to go to. The word 'No' is defined as 'the negative answer or decision; getting the opposite of what is specified' according to Google.

If any of you follow Gary Vaynerchuk (better known as Gary Vee, famous entrepreneur and motivational speaker) said once that you need to 'fall in love with failure.' Accepting failure and how you handle that failure, really determines your destiny. (It does sound cheesy, but it is very true).

So many people let failure defeat them. You might say that failure might not defeat you, but inside it still does. Failure is a daunting feeling that makes you feel less than who you are. Or that you do not have enough potential for something. But here is the thing…YOU DO HAVE THE POTENTIAL FOR SOMETHING.

I love failing. I know, it sounds crazy, but I like failing. Why? Because it helps me narrow down my options, and shows me what is meant to be, and what isn't. Failure is a sign from God saying, 'No, there is another way you can do this, you just haven't found it yet. Keep pushing forward'. I am a firm believer in 'if it's meant to be, it's meant to be, and if it isn't, it isn't'. Failure is like your guide through life, helping you stay off the roads you aren't meant to go down. And when failure does come to you, you essentially find another way.

For example, when you apply for college, you apply to several schools. (Unlike me, only applying to one). So, when I got a response back from the college, they denied my application. I was devastated because I had painted this whole picture in my head of myself there, and that it was the 'only way' to be successful and get to where I want to be in life. Well, I let myself be sad for a solid five minutes, but then I branched out my options, knowing that it is okay and that God didn't want me to go there as well, thus why I got denied. Failure really pisses me off, but it fuels the fire/drive for success I have.

My message to you is take that failure, accept it, maybe laugh at it! You will find another way for success. Just keep working hard, exploring, and making a difference, and you will end up where you need to be, regardless of how you get there.

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