Just over two months have now passed. Two months of grieving and working on myself. It’s weird to put myself first when I haven’t done that in the longest time. And honestly, I feel great. Sure, some days I just want to lay in bed and cry, but for the most part, I would rather be doing anything but. I go out now; I do the things that I felt like I couldn’t do. I spend more time on me than I ever have. I go to Disney in my free time, and I am interning to build experience in the field of social media. Sure, I could have done all this before, but I would have been much more hesitant. I don’t feel as anxious anymore because I don’t have anyone else to worry about. I feel lighter because I’m actually making myself happy, not having to rely on someone else to feed my happiness.
Recently, I went back and read my article to my ex and realized that I am no longer the same person I was when I wrote that. I hoped that we could basically go back to the way things were, sans relationship. Now, I know that is not a possibility. After the break up, it felt like a struggle just to go do things, but now, just over two months later, it’s no longer a struggle. I actually want to go out and do things. And, the best part is, I hardly ever think of him. I don’t think about how I wish I was with him doing these things.
Everyone told me it gets better over time and it took me a while to believe that. I thought it was going to take me at least a year to finally feel like I was over him, but that isn’t the case. Of course, there are still times I miss him, but for the most part, I feel as if I have finally let go and moved on. As Queen Elsa once said, “the past is in the past, let it go.”
For anyone who is struggling with a break up, or any kind of loss, just know you can get through this. I know that is probably the last thing you want to hear, or you’ve heard it from everyone, but I promise you can. You are going to bounce back from this so much stronger and better than you were before. I did it, even if it felt like I never would. The best thing to do is to just throw yourself into what you love. If you love going to Disney because it is your happy place (like me), then go to Disney. Go alone and do the stuff you’ve always wanted to do. Go with some friends who also have passes. Maybe you love to volunteer, so volunteer more and make new friends. Just find something and I promise that one day, you’ll be so busy having fun, you’ll forget why you were even sad in the first place.
