“He’s leaving soon. Are you sure you want to get yourself into this? Think carefully because I really don't even think you guys will last honestly.”
These were the words I heard countless times from my friends when I first became romantically involved with him. And to be completely honest, they were right. I don’t think I was ready to jump into something that was destined to turn into something of distance. But then again, was anyone ever ready for something like that? I thought I’d give this guy a chance, but to be completely honest, I never meant for this to turn into something for serious. I thought it would just be a fling that would fizzle out. But in fact, it was quite the opposite. He became the person I shared everything with from what I bought at the grocery store to family secrets. He became the person I trust more than I trust myself. I learned that I didn’t need to be another person to be with a guy. He taught me that I can still be myself and be loved. Being with him, well, it’s been quite the ride. Most times, it’s been so good, but at times it can also be the reason for my countless tears. But all these emotions have always been worth it. We’re both so busy with our own respective lives, that we’re struggling to spend 100% of our time together despite knowing that these next six months are all we have left before distance permanently separates us.
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Long distance has a bad reputation. People are against it and many are spiteful towards it because of the outcomes they’ve seen. Society thinks long distance relationships mean cheating, taking breaks every other week, no communication, and lack of trust. But sometimes we let society influence how we feel more than we should. Not every relationship will work out, but there will be many that do. And all it takes is a little bit of faith in yourself, in your significant other, and in your relationship. Yes, you’ll find it tiring and hard, and there will times when tension and insecurities will threaten to tear you two apart, but there are so many more positive aspects that can come from all this.
You’ll both get to grow individually and experience things on your own, showing you who you really are. Growing as an individual does not mean you’ll grow apart. Sharing your experiences and lessons learned will allow you to be a part of there life and learn from them. You both grow individually, but you both grow together at the same time. You’ll be forced to build better trust between the two of you. You’ll have to push against the outside forces that will be knocking at the door trying to break the trust you two have. Although it may seem like your trust is about to break, if you’re with the right person, these outside forces will only make your trust for each other stronger. Plus, you even get to learn how to effectively communicate when phone calls, messaging, and video calls are your only means of speaking to each other. You learn how much communication for you two is healthy and how much is too much.
All this may seem like a bunch of clichés that have been said over and over again, but in reality, it’s the truth. I’ve been lucky enough to test run the whole long distance thing for a summer before fully committing to it. It’s taught me so much about myself and about him. I thought that being with him in person taught me a lot about the kind of human he is, but being further away from him taught me so much more. No other guy would ever care for me the amount he cares for me; no other guy would go to all lengths to do things for me the way he does. Being away from each other for three months was tough, but the strength our relationship gained from it was worth it. I wouldn’t change it even if I could. I know that when he graduates in May and leaves for good, I have nothing to worry about. He cares about me, wants the best for me, wants to see me happy.
At the end of the day, being in a long distance relationship with him, for at least another two years will be hard, but it’ll be so worth fighting for.
