If Your Friends And Family Hate Your Partner, They Probably Have A Good Reason To

If Your Friends And Family Hate Your Partner, They Probably Have A Good Reason To

He often talks about her as if she's a sexual object, and to make matters worse, jokes about making decisions for her regarding her body.

1956
views

I've been hearing a lot of talk about Pete Davidson and Ariana Grande. Hearing of their engagement was a shock — to me and most of the world. They'd only been dating for a month before announcing their engagement; and to make matters worse, they entered into a partnership almost immediately after Ariana's split with Mac Miller.

Without knowing anything about the two celebrities, their relationship is already looking problematic.

There are three dating sins that should never be committed, two of which Grande has already done. These dating habits are just plain bad, and they almost end in heartbreak.

I don't claim to be a relationship guru, nor do I get a thrill out of dragging celebrity unions, but analyzing celebrity relationships allows us to make connections in our own personal relationships. People can learn a lot by studying Davidson and Grande's relationship, and not necessarily about its rocky start. Despite the three dating sins listed above, the most problematic aspect of the union so far is how it is being perceived by those who care a great deal about her... her fans.

Fans have a weird relationship with their idols (and vice versa). It's a relationship filled with love and (sometimes a bit obsessive) adoration, despite the two parties not knowing each other personally. Sometimes, these fans know more about celebrities than the famous people know about themselves — and sometimes, they can spot a sinking ship before a celebrity has even realized that it left the harbor.

Since their engagement announcement, Arianators have been quite vocal about their abhorrence of Davidson.

Sure, we can write off their complaints as them still being bitter about the Grande/Miller split, but if that is the case, why didn't people bash Mac Miller after Ariana split with Big Sean? Sure, we can write off Pete's comments as a reflection of his comedic nature and style of "dark humor," but I have to admit that a lot of the things he says are problematic. He often talks about her as if she's a sexual object, and to make matters worse, jokes about making decisions for her regarding her body (who thinks its funny to switch someone's birth control pills?). What makes this situation even more peculiar is that Ariana Grande is a fervent feminist. She's always been vocal about women's rights and women's issues. So why hasn't she checked her fiance about his toxic behavior?

Perhaps love really is blind.

Grande's ignorance of Pete's problematic actions echoes a larger problem in dating. How we are so reluctant to actually listen when those who care about our well-being say something negative about our partners? Perhaps if we were more reticent, we would save ourselves from heartache.

Not only that, but Davidson and Grande's relationship might echo an even large problem when it comes to dating: abuse.

From the outside looking in, I am in no way, shape, or form qualified to suggest that Pete Davidson is an abusive partner, but there are thousands of men and women in the world who are. Their lack of respect for their partners and controlling behavior can cause significant emotional and physical trauma. And since October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month, it's important that we're mindful of the dating choices we're making, and the choices that our loved ones are making. We need to have more open discussions about these topics, because abuse comes in many shapes and forms, and it's important that we're able to spot them early on.

I like Ariana Grande. And I think Pete Davidson is a pretty funny guy (when he's not being problematic). But I have to admit that their relationship gives off warning bells. Ladies and gentlemen, if everyone around you is saying your partner is trash, they probably are.

Popular Right Now

An Open Letter To My Boyfriend's Mom

A simple thank you is not enough.
197972
views

Your son and I have been dating a while now and I just wanted to thank you for everything.

Wow, where do I start? Ever since the day your son brought me into your home you have shown me nothing but kindness. I have not one negative thought about you and I am truly thankful for that. I first and foremost want to thank you for welcoming me with open arms. There are horror stories of mothers resenting their son's girlfriends and I am blessed there is no resentment or harsh feelings.

Thank you for treating me like one of your children, with so much love but knowing exactly when to tease me.

Thank you for sticking up for me when your son teases me, even though I know it’s all in good fun it's always comforting knowing you have someone by your side.

Thank you for raising a man who respects women and knows how to take responsibility of mistakes and not a boy who is immature and doesn’t take responsibility.

Thank you for always including me in family affairs, I may not be blood family but you do everything you can to make sure I feel like I am.

Thank you for letting me make memories with your family.

There is nothing I value more in this world then memories with friends and family and I am thankful you want and are willing to include me in yours. I have so much to thank you for my thoughts keep running together.

The most important thing I have to thank you for is for trusting me with your son. I know how precious and valuable he is and I won't break his heart. I will do everything I can to make him happy. This means more than you could ever imagine and I promise I will never break your trust.

The second most important thing I must thank you for is for accepting me for who I am. Never have you ever wished I looked like another girl or acted like another girl. You simply love and care for me and that’s all I could ever ask. Every person in this world is a unique different person and understanding that means a lot.

The third most important thing I must thank you is teaching me how to one day in the future treat a potential girlfriend that I may interact with as a mother. I am not a mother, but I one day plan to be. If I ever have a son it is because of how you treated me that I am able to be a humble loving mother to this new face that could one day walk into my door. How you have treated me has taught me how I should one day be in the future and I thank you for that.

This may seem all over the place but that’s how my brain gets when I try and thank you for everything you have done for me. It’s all so much and even the little things are so important so I promise my scattered thoughts are all with good intentions and not meant to bombard you. I just want to get the idea across to you that you are important and special to me and everything you do does not go unnoticed.

Sincerely,

Your Son’s Girlfriend

Cover Image Credit: Christian Images and Quotes

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

11 Of The Biggest Tinder Red Flags All Single Women Need To Swipe Left On

The red flags a woman swiping for men shouldn't ignore when it comes to finding someone on Tinder.

875
views

Ah yes, the magical non-dating application that seems to be the go-to for most college singles looking for amusement in their uneventful Saturday night scheme: Tinder. Foreign to those who choose to meet other people in real life as opposed to over the internet or through social media, Tinder is widely popular on most colleges campuses, though one doesn't have to be a university student to make an account. For the readers who are familiar with the swipes of the dismissive or approving nature, you know what I mean when I say that some Tinder accounts aren't "swipe right" worthy. For the woman seeking man on Tinder, these are the 11 biggest red flags.

1. Grammar mistakes

bye

A tale as old as time: being turned off by someone's grammar incompetence. Did he go to the seventh grade? Most likely. So really, this is just a lack of caring on his part. He doesn't care about wooing someone with his articulate dialect? Oh, okay. Swipe left.

2. Risky bio

what why

There are honestly a number of examples of the "risky bio." I once saw a bio that said, "I sell drugs." I'm not joking. Red flag.

3. Their first pic is of them flicking off the camera

bye

I'm personally offended by this man already. Swipe left.

4. The shirtless mirror pic

no

Glad he's confident, that's cool, really. But there's just something about the image of a man standing in front of his dirty bathroom mirror searching for the right angle that is so strange. Just thinking about the multiple attempts that picture could have taken irks me.

5. Boomerang video of them vaping

so hip

Does he still have one of those? Okay...First of all, if vaping is such a significant part of his life that he has to share it with the world, at least he could blow some O's or something, the video playing back-and-forth of that cloud he's blowing is of minimal difficulty. At least try to impress.

6. Boomerang video of them chugging a beer

This isn't Barstool, this is you (the swiper) deciding whether or not a guy worth possibly meeting out in the real world. And while I would be impressed, you don't really know how long it took him to finish chugging that beer. He could have taken minutes, or not even finished the whole thing. Swipe left.

7. Only one picture

scam

Okay, there's only one picture of him in his Tinder profile - this is obviously a catfish. I mean, maybe it isn't, but if you trust a one-pictured profile then you have bigger balls than I do. And if it indeed is not a catfish, you're dealing with a guy who believes there is only ONE picture of himself out there that could tempt a female to swipe right (an issue in itself).

8. The first picture is of their car

car

Do I even need to elaborate on why this is a red flag?

9. When they admit they aren't the age Tinder has them as

too old for this

Okay, so Tinder thinks he's nineteen but in his bio, he is literally admitting to not being the age he submitted. Like... what? Swipe left.

10.  No pictures of them (only their dog)

dog

Honestly, it's a decent strategy these men have until we realize that we just swiped right on a German Shepherd.

11.  They're wearing a U of L shirt

go big blue

The crimson of all red flags. Go cats.

Related Content

Facebook Comments