Within the relatively recent months, my close friend, Katherine, and I have exited our long-term relationships in favor of placing our full attention on our academic and professional careers. Given our status on the precipice of adulthood, we felt--and still feel--that our decisions were rooted in moving in the optimum direction, and we do not regret our actions in the slightest. With the elimination of romantic outings and the general stress that can accompany intense relations, we have obtained an even larger span of time to hone our writing capabilities and explore our potential outside of our selected fields, as well. Of course, these things can absolutely be achieved while in a healthy, involved relationship, but when it came to our specific situations, we felt that freeing ourselves from the constraints that had been placed around us was the best possible option. However, in the midst of our endless hours of work--whether it be at our menial day jobs or the late nights spent tapping away at our keyboards--we've come to realize that we've managed to forge connections with men that don't actually exist.
Let me explain.
Both Katherine and I are avid fiction writers, as well as consistent consumers of novels, films, and anime of varying genres. And while I wouldn't say that either of us have become lonely in the absence of a relationship--in fact, we love the content sensations we derive from our individual success outside of being romantically linked to another person--we do have our moments where we think, "You know, I'm happy I'm single, but I wouldn't mind being in a relationship if so-and-so were real." It's these completely impossible situations that are actually much more comforting, in that the fictional characters are idealistic and while the viewer/reader can enjoy their existence consistently, the consumer doesn't have to actually, you know, be in a relationship with the person.
Of course, there are petitions and such circulating around the Internet advocating for marriage to two-dimensional characters to be recognized, and while I don't really see any issues with this practice (if that's their desire, so be it), that isn't really what I mean when I say that Katherine and I, among millions of other people, love fictional characters. It's a much more platonic act, really.
For example, I recently attended ColossalCon in Sandusky, Ohio, and during Vic Mignogna's panel on Saturday, a young woman approached his question line with tears in her eyes. Through choked sobs, she explained that Tamaki Suoh--Mignogna's character from Ouran High School Host Club--is the reason she is able to make it through her depression due to his positivity in the face of his own terrible obstacles (being an illegitimate son, having a grandmother that hates him, etc.). As someone that has seen that show at least five times, it isn't hard to see why women and men seem to fall head over heels in love with Tamaki, and seeing this fictional character's impact on the lives of those in the real world only reifies the power that these works have over the general populace.
Stories such as this were shared quite often at this convention, as well as others that focused on entire shows or video games that aided in making viewers feel better about their lot in life or simply gave them those "warm fuzzies" that we all admit to feeling at some point or another. To be as honest as possible, I can remember buying Simon's drill necklace (Gurren Lagann) from a vender as a consistent reminder to keep pushing forward and to, eventually, "Pierce the heavens!" I love Simon, perhaps not in a romantic sense, but in that that character is able to help me through struggles wherein I feel like abandoning all hope.
For many, this is where they begin joking about the characters that they consider to be their "waifus" or "husbandos," and while those terms and conversations are generally pretty interesting--you can learn a great deal about a person from those lists--that, still, isn't really what I mean. Do I joke about having husbandos? Yes, all the time. I mean, have you seen Dazai from Bungo Stray Dogs? Exactly. However, we aren't talking about characters being aesthetically pleasing in this situation; we're discussing the means by which characters positively impact our lives as a whole.
In the recent years, I've seen a great deal of people on Tumblr--and many other sites--rally behind Steve Rodgers or Sherlock Holmes because they feel personally connected to these characters and, through these connections, have been able to maintain their strength in harrowing circumstances. There's absolutely nothing wrong with imagining Rodgers or Holmes cheering you on when you're having a shitty day. In fact, I advocate for that kind of activity. If it makes you feel better, imagine your favorite characters doing whatever you like (unless it's the sexualizing of fictional, underage characters because those shenanigans needs to be stopped, like, yesterday).
Unfortunately, there is a somewhat dangerous aspect to this kind of practice when it is taken further than the intended limit, which isn't necessarily posed by anyone, but obsessive activity can end in turmoil more often than not. Let's go back to Tamaki for a moment.
While the person that wrote the text for this image remained anonymous, this sentiment worries me deeply. Of course, it is incredibly fun to immerse yourself in a fictional world where wonderful men and women exist without misogyny and other awful variants, but becoming so completely enthralled by this nonexistent universe that the real world begins to induce genuine despair is dangerous. In order for fans and character to coexist, a barrier must be recognized, and those of us on the side of reality should take a step back once in a while and say, "Oh, right. They aren't real. What a bummer. Anyway, moving on."
And this will be difficult for some people, which is perfectly understandable. I know there are many aspects of this world that horrify most of us, but don't sell the real world short. I'm sure you'll find your own Tamaki Suoh out there someday, anonymous writer.
An additional negative to the infatuation with fiction is that some viewers/readers might find themselves falling for the wrong kind of person. When I say "the wrong kind," I don't mean that in the sense that some characters are more attractive than others and, dammit, you should pick the one that is the most popular. If that were the case, everyone would be in love with Attack on Titan's Levi Ackerman (I mean, nearly everyone is, anyway, so maybe that's a poor example).
I've spoken about a certain character before named Sebastian Michaelis, and while he is absolutely one of my favorite characters of any form of fiction, he's also a despicable excuse for a being that sexually assaults a woman. He's a great character in the sense that he fits the story and that he is well written, but no one should ever lust after someone that acts in this fashion.
And yet...
...some people see this and immediately lose their minds. It doesn't matter that he likes cats, guys. He's terrible. Stop wishing for men like him; that crap is dangerous.
In all truth, losing yourself in the realm of fiction is amazing and can be very rewarding when those bouts of time spent in the fictional realm result in helping you through your own life, but as a general rule, it is important to remember the stark differences between the two, and that not every attractive, fictional man or woman is necessarily good news.
Just have some fun and be safe in regards to your fictional characters of choice, alright?
