There's No Handbook On How To Fall In Love In College

There's No Handbook On How To Fall In Love In College

So do it how it fits you best.

I'm at that point in my life where I basically have three different sets of friends. My graduating class is basically split into three parts. There's the half that has a job, a kid or two, and married. Then there's the half that has no interest in a relationship, drinks every night of the week, and constantly complains about being broke and their excessive amount of homework. And then there is the very small portion that falls in between the two. Those maybe still in college, or just graduating, maybe in a relationship but not quite to the point of marriage, and those working an adult job, but maybe not fully transitioned into everything that means being an adult.

Most people seem to handle this phase with grace. I, however, am having a few struggles. You see, I fall in that category of those few in between. I am still in college and will be for six more years (vet school..), but I live with my boyfriend whom I have talked marriage with. I sometimes feel as if I should hold off on marriage, I mean what's the rush? I don't plan on having kids until I am done with school, so why rush to marry? But then again, I have the part of me that wishes the job, marriage, and kids part of life could come a little quicker.

I mean, how am I supposed to do both? I have to live away from my boyfriend during the school year, except on breaks, because I go to school in another city, an hour away. So if we get married right now, how is that supposed to work? Is it okay to be married and live apart? Or should we just wait?

It's an awkward phase for sure, being in between what I feel like is being a true adult, and still being a college kid.

I know I can't be the only one to feel this way.

There's just no handbook on how to do these things. I mean no one seems to wait and do things the old fashioned way, finish school, get married, get a job, have kids. So since the standard is changing, it's confusing to me.

I guess we just take it as we take everything now and interpret it the way it fits best. Go to college or get a job, fall in love and get married on your own timeline, if a kid pops in the picture, handle it the best way possible.

Love is complicated, so this isn't supposed to be easy. That's the true test of knowing if that relationship is gonna work, because you have to deal with life in between.

So, whatever phase you're at in your young adult life, do things how they fit you best and don't worry about the rest.

Cover Image Credit: vvampireeffreakk / Flickr

Popular Right Now

An Open Letter To My Boyfriend's Mom

A simple thank you is not enough.

Your son and I have been dating a while now and I just wanted to thank you for everything.

Wow, where do I start? Ever since the day your son brought me into your home you have shown me nothing but kindness. I have not one negative thought about you and I am truly thankful for that. I first and foremost want to thank you for welcoming me with open arms. There are horror stories of mothers resenting their son's girlfriends and I am blessed there is no resentment or harsh feelings.

Thank you for treating me like one of your children, with so much love but knowing exactly when to tease me.

Thank you for sticking up for me when your son teases me, even though I know it’s all in good fun it's always comforting knowing you have someone by your side.

Thank you for raising a man who respects women and knows how to take responsibility of mistakes and not a boy who is immature and doesn’t take responsibility.

Thank you for always including me in family affairs, I may not be blood family but you do everything you can to make sure I feel like I am.

Thank you for letting me make memories with your family.

There is nothing I value more in this world then memories with friends and family and I am thankful you want and are willing to include me in yours. I have so much to thank you for my thoughts keep running together.

The most important thing I have to thank you for is for trusting me with your son. I know how precious and valuable he is and I won't break his heart. I will do everything I can to make him happy. This means more than you could ever imagine and I promise I will never break your trust.

The second most important thing I must thank you for is for accepting me for who I am. Never have you ever wished I looked like another girl or acted like another girl. You simply love and care for me and that’s all I could ever ask. Every person in this world is a unique different person and understanding that means a lot.

The third most important thing I must thank you is teaching me how to one day in the future treat a potential girlfriend that I may interact with as a mother. I am not a mother, but I one day plan to be. If I ever have a son it is because of how you treated me that I am able to be a humble loving mother to this new face that could one day walk into my door. How you have treated me has taught me how I should one day be in the future and I thank you for that.

This may seem all over the place but that’s how my brain gets when I try and thank you for everything you have done for me. It’s all so much and even the little things are so important so I promise my scattered thoughts are all with good intentions and not meant to bombard you. I just want to get the idea across to you that you are important and special to me and everything you do does not go unnoticed.


Your Son’s Girlfriend

Cover Image Credit: Christian Images and Quotes

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

10 Things Girls Secretly Love

Come on guys — take a hint.


Let's face it, girls can be a little stubborn at times and not directly come out and say what they want. But, a few of these should be obvious clues that boys should be able to pick up on. So I have comprised a short list of at least ten obvious things girls, or at least I secretly love.

1. Leave her cute texts

Quickest way to put a smile on her face or leave butterflies in her stomach is to send her a cute text. Even if it's simple

2. Kiss her in front of your friends

Don't be one of those guys that treats your girlfriend/SO differently because you are around your friends. It validates that she really means something to you if you still show her off around your friends.

3. Tell her she looks beautiful

Even if she denies it and says she looks gross, you've still managed to get her attention and show her you think she's beautiful no matter what.

4. Kiss her forehead

5. Let her take photos of you

Slight obsession over your boyfriend is normal, I promise, she just thinks your adorable.

6. Tell her when you have something to do, don't just ignore her randomly

Most girls won't be mad when you have something else to do. It's the fact that you couldn't take the time to send a text that would probably take a minute to write to let her know you aren't just dodging her messages.

7. Play with her hair

If she does it for you, then you do it for her. Don't just let her play with your hair for a half hour then run your fingers through her hair twice and think your done. No, we want the relaxing feeling of fingers running through our hair too.

8. Watch movies with her

You don't always need to go out and do something active, watching a movie and cuddling is nice too. Netflix and Chill

9. Let her fall asleep on you

10. Be her best friend

Sometimes all you need is someone to laugh at stupid jokes with, sing loudly in the car with, or just sit in silence and listen to the world outside a car window.

Every girl wants to feel special and treated the right way in a relationship. But just as girls are stubborn, guys are just a little bit clueless. So take notes boys.

Cover Image Credit:

Maille Dolan

Related Content

Facebook Comments