fall ideas

Just Because You're Not In A Relationship Doesn't Mean You Can't Enjoy Fall

Attention singles, hold on to your pumpkins, because it's time to get spooky.

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vicalv
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It's that time of year again.

Pumpkins, Halloween Horror Nights, horror movies, candy, and—of course—annoying, but adorable couples flaunting their relationships. Pumpkin patches are filled with married couples and their babies doing ridiculously cute photoshoots. Clever college couple costumes parading Pinterest boards. Thanksgiving and Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa/other religious holiday conversations with your nosey family members are almost exclusively revolving around the impending question of your non-existent significant other.

My intention is not to sound bitter at all, but let's be real, the holidays are dominated by couples.

It's almost normalized to feel lonely when you are single during the holidays. People poke fun through tweets and memes and it's all fun and dandy to laugh about it. But to be honest, when you see your best friends looking hella cute while carving pumpkins with their significant others, it kind of sucks.

But I purpose a new form of thinking: get spooky all by yourself, boo. It's time to get creative.

Go to the pumpkin patch, ignore the cute couple with the insanely adorable baby, and get the weirdest looking pumpkin you can find. Instead of carving a normal jack-o'-lantern, create a funny original masterpiece. Maybe carve an intricate silhouette or make a pumpkin version of your best friend. Go wild.

Costumes are annoying because there are so many cute couple ideas. My suggestion? Be a tasteful but a satirical asshole. Do a couple costume idea with your bestie. Can you imagine anything better than two frat boys who are clearly in full swing of their Bromance being Baby and Johnny from "Dirty Dancing?" Or two girls being Bill and Ted from "Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure?"

If you want to go solo, get specific with your Pinterest boards and find clever single costumes. Guys have limited options because they can't put on lingerie (or can you? *wink*) and call it day. Maybe be the "Hello, welcome to chili's" vine or a Teletubby. Girls, maybe you shouldn't put on lingerie and call it a day because the slutty animal costumes are a bit overdone. Put down the "Risky Business" button down and be the best, random, obscure 90s figure you can be.

The holidays with the fam is a bit tricky. They have a way of finding your weakness and cutting through it like a roasted turkey. Contain the urge to throw ornaments at your loved ones or smashing gingerbread houses when they ask "Are you still single, honey?" Instead, own up to it and be proud of it. Hell yeah, you are single and you are going to enjoy the hell out of fall.

Roast horror movies with your best friends while snacking on candy you illegally brought from home. Use your friends as a shield and scream at Halloween Horror Nights, it's better than trying to act tough to impress someone. Dress up for fall festivals and take cute pictures for the gram. The options are endless.

The fall season is amazing and it shouldn't be seen as a negative reminder. It should be seen as a positive reminder to enjoy being a hot, carefree single while you still can.

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To The Dad Who Didn't Want Me, It's Mutual Now

Thank you for leaving me because I am happy.
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Thank you, for leaving me.

Thank you, for leaving me when I was little.

Thank you, for not putting me through the pain of watching you leave.

Thank you, for leaving me with the best mother a daughter could ask for.

I no longer resent you. I no longer feel anger towards you. I wondered for so long who I was. I thought that because I didn't know half of my blood that I was somehow missing something. I thought that who you were defined me. I was wrong. I am my own person. I am strong and capable and you have nothing to do with that. So thank you for leaving me.

In my most vulnerable of times, I struggled with the fact that you didn't want me. You could have watched me grow into the person that I have become, but you didn't. You had a choice to be in my life. I thought that the fact that my own father didn't want me spoke to my own worth. I was wrong. I am so worthy. I am deserving, and you have nothing to do with that. So thank you for leaving me.

You have missed so much. From my first dance to my first day of college, and you'll continue to miss everything. You won't see me graduate, you won't walk me down the aisle, and you won't get to see me follow my dreams. You'll never get that back, but I don't care anymore. What I have been through, and the struggles that I have faced have brought me to where I am today, and I can't complain. I go to a beautiful school, I have the best of friends, I have an amazing family, and that's all I really need.

Whoever you are, I hope you read this. I hope you understand that you have missed out on one of the best opportunities in your life. I could've been your daughter. I could have been your little girl. Now I am neither, nor will I ever be.

So thank you for leaving me because I am happy. I understand my self-worth, and I understand that you don't define me. You have made me stronger. You have helped make me who I am without even knowing it.

So, thank you for leaving me.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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My Boyfriend's Family Helped Me Find My Home Away From Home

Taking "home is where the heart is" to a new level.

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I have always heard that one day I will find a place that will feel like my home away from home, specifically with my significant other. Honestly, I couldn't envision loving a place like the way I do my hometown, let alone love it even more. Nonetheless, here I am, sitting in the Little Rock, Arkansas airport tearing up as I say goodbye to my home away from home.

Let me tell you about my hometown. I live in a relatively small town in Wyoming and it has always been my home. My family, friends and work are here in Wyoming. But, there happens to be this man who has my whole entire heart. His hometown is a little town in Arkansas, that also happens to be 17 hours away from me. I came to visit him in his hometown for the first time ever. Not only to see Arkansas for the first time but to see him for the first time in a month and to have the opportunity to meet his family.

I won't lie, meeting parents for the first time is definitely nerve-wracking. It's not that I am hard to get along with, it's the fact that I want them to love me because I love their son and I couldn't conceptualize that ever changing. From the moment I stepped into their home, I was welcomed with big arms and beautiful smiles. His family welcomed me, a complete stranger, into their home with no questions asked. Right away I knew I felt like I was home.

Finding your home away from home is easy to recognize. Home is a place full of love and laughter and that is what I found in Arkansas. It was a second home that I felt comfortable in. Feeling comfortable somewhere is not always the easiest feeling to grasp. For me, I feel the need to be in a comfortable place to be myself and call it "home."

I believe that it is essential for everyone to have a "second home" or a "home away from home." Having a second family can and does provide so much more love in my life I never knew I needed. I of course do and always will love and adore my family with my whole heart and soul but having these other people in my life gives me so much assurance that I'll always be surrounded with love and happiness. You can never have too many friends, too much family and certainly never too much love. So thank you. Thank you for welcoming me, loving me as your own, and showing me that having a home away from home is such a positive part of my life.

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