1. It's not.
I have always been a believer in being friends with exes. Why not be their friend? If they cared about you in the relationship, they must still care about you. Recently, however, I have discovered that exes do not make good friends... and here's why:
- Someone is always going to get their feelings hurt.
Whether it be you or the ex, someone will get jealous when new romances start happening. We can tell ourselves 1,000 times that we are over someone, but once they find a new person, it is going to hurt and there will be jealousy. Stay away from sad feelings and don't try to be "just friends" with an ex!
- There will be accidental hook-ups.
How many times have you tried the "just friends" situation, and it worked out smoothly? Never, the answer is never. One day you will hang out as "friends" and someone will kiss the other. One thing will lead to the next, and next thing you know, you just accidentally hooked up with your ex. Don't make decisions you will regret. Don't be friends with an ex.
- The feeling of "What if?".
You and your ex broke up for a reason. Always remember that reason. When you try to be friends with an ex, you start to develop a feeling of "What if?". What if you guys were still together? What if you would have been a better girlfriend? What if they had been that nice when you were together? What if you guys tried to date again now? An ex is an ex for a reason. Avoid the feeling of "What if?". Avoid second-guessing yourself and the break-up. Don't be friends with an ex.
- Out with the old, in with the new.
With time, you will find new beginnings with new people. The last thing a new girlfriend or boyfriend wants to hear is that you are friends with your ex. From the beginning this will create feelings of jealousy and uncertainty. Let your exes go. They are in your past for a reason. If you expect to bring in a new person, you must first get rid of your last. Don't let feelings of an ex linger in your life while you're trying to start a new life with someone else. Don't be friends with an ex!
Of course there are so many exceptions to this, and some people can successfully be friend with their exes under certain circumstances. I, however, have had only traumatic experiences and do not recommend it.
Let your new life, without your ex, be drama free by staying away from "just friends", what-ifs and old feelings!
