“Everyone Knows The Third Movie Is Always The Worst”

“Everyone Knows The Third Movie Is Always The Worst”

Hollywood’s unfortunate third installments.

“Everyone Knows The Third Movie is Always The Worst” — Jean Grey

In this summer’s "X-Men Apocalypse," Jean Grey (played by Sophie Turner) assisted director Bryan Singer in hitting what seems like the final nail on the coffin for Fox’s "X-Men series." Grey would say the show stopping line above as a backhanded insult to not only "Return of The Jedi" but also (and more so) to "X-Men: The Last Stand," pleasing "X-Men" and "Star Wars" fans alike. However, when the curtain fell, the irony stung. Hard. Why? Because "Apocalypse" fell hard in the shadow of it’s predecessors too.The reaction went from “ Woah, savage!” to “ Um, yea, I watch 'The Avengers' now”.

This isn’t limited to "X-Men" though, as many other films prove that the third time, indeed, is not the charm. It’s understandable that one cannot create well received films every time! After all, how do you consistently recreate the glory of "Star Wars" and "The Empire Strikes Back." Please take this list as tongue in cheek because A. I love these films and B. I can't knock it out of the park either as a writer on here every week! Here are some unfortunate third installments:

1. "Spider-Man 3" (2007)

Oh, Tobey.


This movie wasn’t so bad. The issue was of how it didn’t tap into it’s potential of a great storyline. To begin, there were like three and a half villains in this movie. I absolutely love the Venom/Symbiote storyline and that should have been allowed to develop alongside the new Green Goblin rising and then turning face at the end (hence being half a villain). Finally, the choice to stray away from the comics to enter the Sandman plot (him killing Uncle Ben) as an emotional tug on Peter waters down the plot. All in all, still a good film and a stellar portrayal of the Symbiote.

2. "The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of The Dawn Treader" (2010)

"The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe" was amazing! But fast forward 1000's of years and these Narnians are still not holding it down. That’s not really an issue though because that’s the basis of the Narnia story. I think the same energy and character dynamics you have when Lucy, Edmund, Peter, and Susan all together is unmatchable when half of the crew isn’t there. It didn't work as well. Also, applause for Will Poulter for being an amazing. Despite his role technically being one of the lesser things about the movie, you could tell he was talented. Remember him from We’re the Millers and Maze Runner? He is so funny in everything he does. Great future for that guy. But I digress.

3. "X-Men: The Last Stand" (2006) and "X:Men Apocalypse" (2016)

Oh the irony! Both being the third installments of fairly successful trilogies, they had all kinds of expectations. I would say that "Apocalypse" had even larger expectations considering it’s inception in the new Golden Era of comic book movies. I don’t want to talk too much about this because I will be covering the "X-Men" at length at a later date.

4. "Iron Man 3" (2013)

The Marvel Cinematic Universe is the greatest thing to happen to superhero movies since 2003’s "X2." However, it is impossible to perpetuate consistency. When I heard that the Mandarin was going to be on the big screen I was ecstatic! This was the iconic "Iron Man" story I cared about and when I heard Mandarin was going to be on the big screen I knew "Iron Man 3" was about to be my favorite Iron Man movie. Well....

Guys. This. Cannot. Be. Mandarin.

I am not on board with the idea of a fake Mandarin. It goes against everything I enjoyed about the super villain as a kid. I guess kudos to creativity because this guy played the joke Mandarin pretty well. And with that being said, this was my favorite "Iron Man" movie (even though it wasn't as well received as the first one).

For anyone who cares, this is Mandarin.

5. "Stuart Little 3: Call of the Wild" (2005)

Stuart is the forgotten gem of the late 90’s/ early 2000’s. You didn’t know there was a Stuart Little Three did you? Yes, it happened. It was a cartoon, and it just didn’t work as well as the previous two. A majority of the plot is animal-animal interaction in the woods rather than the animal-human interactions in the big city of New York that made "Stuart Little" special.

You can’t beat real Stuart.

Honorable Mention:

"Star Wars Episode VI: Return of The Jedi" (1983)

This isn't on the core list because, although it isn't as well received as the first two, it really isn’t bad at all. Personally, this is my second favorite after "Empire." I mean, maybe they should have explained how Anakin became a force ghost considering he was only really shown to be on the light side for a good 10 minutes, but that’s not necessarily bad as that can be expanded on later. I would even rank this as one of the greatest films of all time.

Anytime Princess.

Cover Image Credit: https://imgflip.com/memetemplate/42080055/Star-Wars-Beach-Party

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To The Girl Struggling With Her Body Image

It's not about the size of your jeans, but the size of your heart, soul, and spirit.


To the girl struggling with her body image,

You are more than the number on the scale. You are more than the number on your jeans and dresses. You are way more than the number of pounds you've gained or lost in whatever amount of time.

Weight is defined as the quantity of matter contained by a body or object. Weight does not define your self-worth, ambition or potential.

So many girls strive for validation through the various numbers associated with body image and it's really so sad seeing such beautiful, incredible women become discouraged over a few numbers that don't measure anything of true significance.

Yes, it is important to live a healthy lifestyle. Yes, it is important to take care of yourself. However, taking care of yourself includes your mental health as well. Neglecting either your mental or physical health will inflict problems on the other. It's very easy to get caught up in the idea that you're too heavy or too thin, which results in you possibly mistreating your body in some way.

Your body is your special, beautiful temple. It harbors all of your thoughts, feelings, characteristics, and ideas. Without it, you wouldn't be you. If you so wish to change it in a healthy way, then, by all means, go ahead. With that being said, don't make changes to impress or please someone else. You are the only person who is in charge of your body. No one else has the right to tell you whether or not your body is good enough. If you don't satisfy their standards, then you don't need that sort of negative influence in your life. That sort of manipulation and control is extremely unhealthy in its own regard.

Do not hold back on things you love or want to do because of how you interpret your body. You are enough. You are more than enough. You are more than your exterior. You are your inner being, your spirit. A smile and confidence are the most beautiful things you can wear.

It's not about the size of your jeans. It's about the size of your mind and heart. Embrace your body, observe and adore every curve, bone and stretch mark. Wear what makes you feel happy and comfortable in your own skin. Do your hair and makeup (or don't do either) to your heart's desire. Wear the crop top you've been eyeing up in that store window. Want a bikini body? Put a bikini on your body, simple.

So, as hard as it may seem sometimes, understand that the number on the scale doesn't measure the amount or significance of your contributions to this world. Just because that dress doesn't fit you like you had hoped doesn't mean that you're any less of a person.

Love your body, and your body will love you right back.

Cover Image Credit: Lauren Margliotti

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The Football World Loses One Of Its Finest Players

Bart Starr passed away and NFL players, coaches, and fans all mourn the loss of the Packer legend, but his life and career will live on in hearts of Packer nation forever.


Bart Starr passed away at the age of 85 in Birmingham, Alabama. The NFL lost a great player. The Green Bay Packers lost a hero. And, the world lost a true gentleman. Starr's legacy has surpassed his accomplishments on the gridiron. He inspired not only his peers but the generations that have come after him. He is — and always — will be remembered as a Hall of Famer, a champion, and a Packer.

Bart Starr was a Packers legend. Starr led Green Bay to six division titles and five world championships. As the quarterback of Vince Lombardi's offense, he kept the machine going and executed the plays like no other. His mastery of the position was a large part of the Packers success in the 1960s. Starr was also the perfect teammate for the perfect team. His leadership put him in command of the Packers. Starr's time in Green Bay will not be forgotten by former players, coaches, and the fans.

Bart Starr's resume is rivaled by few in NFL history. He played in 10 postseason games and won 9 of them. He led the Packers to victory in Super Bowls I and II and won the MVP award in both games. He was the MVP of the league in 1966 and was named to the NFL All-Decade Team of the 1960s. The Packers retired his number 15 and Starr has been inducted into the Packers and Pro Football Hall of Fame.

After his playing days, Starr would become the head coach of the Packers. He could not repeat the success he had on the field from the 1960s teams. His coaching years do not take away from his legacy as one of the all-time great Packers. Starr was inducted into the Pro Football Hall of Fame in 1977.

One of Starr's last visits to Lambeau field was on a cold November night in 2015. Starr and his wife attended a ceremony in which the Packers retired Brett Favre's jersey number. Starr was the perfect personification of what it meant to be a Packer. His most heroic moment came in the 1967 NFL Championship Game. The Ice Bowl came down to a third and goal in Lambeau Field's south endzone against the Dallas Cowboys. Starr came to the sidelines and bravely told Vince Lombardi that he can sneak it in for a game-winning touchdown. Lombardi then replied, "Run it, and let's get the hell out of here." Starr ran a quarterback sneak for the game-winner and the Packers were off to Super Bowl II. Without Starr, Green Bay would not have won a second straight Super Bowl. His leadership in big game moments will live with Packers fans for a lifetime.

Vince Lombardi: A Football Life - The Ice Bowl

Starr leaves behind his wife Cherry, his son, and three granddaughters. Packers fans will have a tight grip on the memories Bart Starr and the 60s teams created. Starr left behind a template for being a Green Bay Packer. He also left a template for being a good man and a gentleman of the game of football. He was a competitor and a leader. Packer nation mourns for the loss of one of the finest human beings the game has seen.

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