Ah, inter-gendered best-friendships… so controversial, yet I believe so necessary for healthy relationships and friendships with any members of the opposite sex. In case you didn’t already guess, I'll tell you that I am best friends with a guy and have been since the third grade.
My best friend has played multiple roles throughout our friendship - he's been my gossip buddy, my fake boyfriend if I ever needed one, my honest-to-God brother, and above all, my true friend.
He's been there for me through life, breakups, puberty (and all that that implies), high school graduation, my best and worst days, and I'd flat-out be lying if I said it hasn't been one of the greatest experiences of my life.
Yet, so many people in our culture today try to slam a best friendship between people of the opposite sex, saying that “there's no way they don't like each other” or “one of them definitely put the other one in the friend zone."
These kinds of comments or jokes about a guy and girl best friend eventually ending up together happen all the time, and honestly, it's such a shame. It's an absolute shame that people of different genders can't spend time together and grow close as friends without being made fun of for “not getting together already.”
Choosing not to be friends because of this might make you miss out on a friendship that could very well be the most rewarding one you've ever had… without it ever turning into a relationship.
There are so many benefits to having a best friend of the opposite gender.
One of the most obvious is getting an insider's opinion from the mind of the other sex.
There have been countless times when I've been confused about a guy or curious as to how they would respond to something and I've had to rely on my best friend to bestow upon me his knowledge on how a guy thinks. It's like having a free wealth of valuable information at your fingertips whenever you need it!
And girls, let's be honest… we all need this in our lives.
Another benefit that's so crucial to a friendship is being able to speak your mind freely.
Often in friendships between members of the same sex, people have to really put a filter on what they say to ensure it's not offensive or something that could be made fun of later on.
Girls, for some reason, come with a lot of drama and ALL the feelings and in serious conversations, it's often difficult for one person to say what they mean without hurting the other one's feelings.
Guys, on the completely opposite end of the spectrum, tend to have to put on a certain face around other male friends and it's difficult to truly open up about feelings without it being “weird."
Having a best friend of the opposite gender is so liberating and just awesome because you can be brutally honest. Also, it can be a total feelings fest and everyone's okay with that arrangement.
One final (and such an awesome) benefit is when a girl is best friends with a guy, she knows he will always have her back and be forgiving.
When girls do stupid stuff that makes their girl best friend angry, it often takes months or years to gain that trust back.
Admittedly, girls can be a little flaky and say things about their “friends” that can definitely be seen as a stab in the back. When a guy and girl are best friends, however, there's a lot less of that drama occurring.
Even if the other person does or says something dumb, you know that your friendship is special, so you don't spend all your time being angry at them after a fight and you certainly don't badmouth them.
This said, having a best friend of the other gender is just amazing.
If you're still feeling skeptical, I and many others are living proof that yes, girls, it is possible for you to be best friends with a guy and see each other completely platonically.
I would even encourage it. There is so much you can learn about how to relate to someone of the opposite sex from being best friends with one of them, and you develop such a special bond that’s unlike any other friendship you have.
While you will definitely get “will you two start dating already?” on most days, you're secure in the knowledge that your best friend is your brother and is there to look out for you.
“There are ‘friends’ who destroy each other, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother.” – Proverbs 18:24 (NLT)
