One lesson that we have all learned in college, as well as in life, is that expectations do not always match reality. This is particularly true for an English major. Here's what you can really expect if you're studying English.
1. Not Reading Everything
You'll probably start off each of your upper division literature classes thinking to yourself, "I'm going to do a critical reading of every single assigned text." You won't. Life will happen, as it always does, and you'll learn what's OK to speed read, what to look over briefly, and what to skip completely.
2. Writing Papers Hours Before They're Due
In the first year of studying English, it'll likely take weeks of planning and days of writing to finish a paper. By the time that you're a senior, you'll be able to whip out a decent paper in a couple hours. Although it's always better to give yourself ample time to edit, the more that you write, the quicker that you'll find yourself finishing essays that you would have once feared.
3. Learning To Love The Literature That You Once Hated.
Disliking Shakespeare is a sin in the English department. Where you may have once hated the dead, white, male authors who you were forced to read, you'll now likely find yourself loving and cherishing the works of Hemingway, Hogarth, Pope, and Poe.
4. Realizing How Sexist The Literary Canon Is
This is not to throw the dead, white, male authors under the bus, but the literary canon is greatly lacking in the fairer sex. It took way too long for Emily Dickenson to become canonized and it only takes one look at the table of contents pages of any Norton anthology to see that the literary world is made up of mostly men. It won't take you long to notice the bias. However, once you do, it'll force you to read everything with a feminist outlook.
5. Feeling Guilty For Pleasure Reading
Reading for fun will likely become a thing of the past when you begin the semester. With the gargantuan amount of assigned reading that you'll be given, you likely won't find the time unless you kill your social life, quit your job, or (and this might actually happen) skip your school reading for pleasure reading.
6. Receiving Constant Ridicule
"Why don't you study something more practical?" "What are you going to do with a degree in English?" "You won't make any money" "You already speak English, why would you need to study it?" These are a just a few of the comments that I have heard since switching my major to English. The best defense, I find, is humor. Come up with responses that'll throw your critics off guard. Another way to defend yourself whilst on English major trial is to throw out a random fact. For example, Barbara Walters and Steven Spielberg were both English majors. If all else fails and you can't think of anything to say, just quote Atticus Finch: "Shoot all the blue jays you want, if you can hit 'em, but remember it's a sin to kill a mockingbird."
