When I first started the series "The Summer Of You" I was a different person, and at the end of the summer, I now reflect in a different aspect. We don't realize how much we change in such a short period of time, like 3 months, but we do. I look back three months ago, and I see a whole other girl telling one of her friends that she wanted to only focus on herself. When I look at myself now, I can see a different girl, trying to change her old bad habits into good ones; that benefit not only herself but others.
I came back to college I had to go on a school retreat for leadership, and I was dreading it. I looked at it as two whole days that would be a waste of my time, little did I know that I would make awesome friends, meet new people, and leave with an even more open mind. I am the first to say I did not think it would change my mindset, or that this retreat would even help me. When I finished the retreat, I walked away with something I thought I never realized was missing. My heart. Often times we don't realize how much we are hiding behind ourselves, and how much we are holding ourselves back. I realized that during those two days, and I was shocked. We have to start bettering ourselves before we can start to help others, because if we are torn down, then we aren't going to be the best person we can be. It's a cycle, and I did not see it before now. Here I was thinking, I had to lose weight, be a better singer, try to stay out of the drama, keep more organized, and continue to push myself. But at the end of the day, it doesn't matter what you look like, and how well you do something if you aren't happy with who you are.
It's funny how one event can change the outlook you personally have on things, and make you become better for it. So how do we start making the changes we want to make? Something that really stuck with me throughout this retreat, stops saying "I should" and start saying "I will." If we start with that, we will begin to make changes, but you have to stick them. It isn't "let's go on a diet", and then when you finally lose the weight go back to eating pizza and fast food because then you are going to gain back everything you worked so hard to lose. You have to change your lifestyle, and that goes past losing weight, it needs to be for everything.
What I have learned in just two days is something that I can apply to the rest of my life. I learned what I truly need to make myself happy, and how I can start to make the changes I want to make. I never really faced the insecurities I had up front the way I did there, and when I came out of it I realized how much I am holding myself back, not anyone else, me. We forget that we stand in the way of our own adventures, and we should start doing the things we want to do, and not let our insecurities get in the way. To new beginnings of starting new, and becoming the best version of yourself.
This is the ending of my "Summer of Me" and I can say that I am happy, even though I didn't meet all my goals. I am starting new this school year, and I can start new personal goals. I had something that I dreaded change my outlook on myself, and my life. We all can have that experience one day, and it will most likely come when you least expect it to. We need to start small with our lifestyle changes and really focus on one day at a time. We need to realize that it won't happen overnight, but if we keep working at it then eventually with time we will meet our goals. Always remember to stay positive, be the best version of you, and love yourself.
