The Rise Of Elijah And Christine

The Rise Of Elijah And Christine

A timeless comedic duo.
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Who are they? What are they? Where did they come from?

To start, Elijah and Christine are YouTubers. Christine started on Vine and Elijah started on Twitter, both for comedy. Now they make videos together, are engaged, and have the most electric videos on YouTube. When you hear that “bing bong,” know it’s a video from Elijah and Christine.

None other than my gay best friend introduced me to the timeless duo. That night we had done exactly something that Elijah and Christine would do: a trip to Target at midnight for snacks and face-masks. Even more like Elijah and Christine, one of us was skilled in using the mask while the other was not. Either way, while the mask was drying, we sat on the couch in the dark, and he turned on their first video.

Skipping over Christine’s solo videos, some of which I had already seen, we went right to “STEVE JOBS IS ALIVE??” and I have to say, I haven’t laughed that hard in a while. Getting drunk in the prime of the afternoon certainly doesn’t appeal to me, but it is always fun to watch. Elijah and Christine seem to be the balance of each other, with Nick as an added bonus. However, it wasn’t until they introduced Tom that I was truly sold.

In the video called, “HE PROPOSED AT TACO BELL!!” Tom comes back from England and immediately I fell in love. However, Tom wasn’t the highlight of this video- it was Elijah proposing to Christine with a ring pop. Now, this seems cute, but remember it is Elijah and Christine we’re talking about, so something has to be off. The cute little ring, Elijah hid it in a burrito that Christine found while eating. I think I was crying, but not from sentiment, from laughter.

In all of their antics, I have to say that my favorite Elijah and Christine video is “WE MADE AN ALIEN DILDO BONG!!” From the title and opening credits until the very end I was laughing so hard. The name in itself already strikes a chord with me, but then seeing Elijah “rip the dick” and try to go about it seriously…it was too much. The star of the video this time was Eugene the dog and the dildo Christine found on the street. They stuck the dildo on the glass and Eugene bit it off, after sliding the door open from pulling so hard. I use this video as a starter to everyone I introduce Elijah and Christine to.

Elijah and Christine (and Nick and Tom and Eugene) are the best of friends and never fail to make people smile. Whether they’re at drag shows, Ikea, or buying easy bake ovens to make weed brownies, they always do something that could potentially get them in trouble. Some people like to give Elijah and Christine a hard time for being bad YouTubers, but I don’t see how YouTube could get any better. Put together a Donald Trump fan-fiction writer and bible-studies Viner and you get Elijah and Christine, an undeniable comedy act. Subscribe to their YouTube channel here and try and get them to one million subscribers- if they hit it, they get hitched!
Cover Image Credit: Twitter

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NINE-NINE

The wonderful lighthearted Police show we all love.
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So you are looking for a new show to watch but don’t want anything too dramatic? Look no further than Brooklyn Nine Nine! This show deserves an Emmy award for best television show. Here are the top reasons why:

The show is genuinely good.Most shows on TV today are okay at best but B99 is awesome.It isn’t one of those shows that has gone on too long and been drawn out.

The characters are amazing. Each one has been totally developed and everyone gets a fair amount of screen time. This is important in a diverse cast such as this one.

ALSO THERE'S A CORGI.

The actors are so genuine.You can feel specific personality traits come out in the characters.The actors often confirm quirks about their characters on both the social media and within the show itself.

Gina Linetti and her sarcastic one liners are my life. I love her so much and she has so many great scenes that truly stand out.


The show gave us several romantic ships to root for but none of them ever held a candle to the original best ship, Jake x Amy and their slow burn but natural friends to lovers romance. I can't believe these two nerds invented the idea of two best friends being in love.


The cast of characters are diverse without it being a big deal. There are people of color, differing sexual orientations and various religious affiliations all in major positions of power and no one bats an eye. This is important as the characters make these traits a part of them without them being questioned about it.


IN SUMMARY, Brooklyn Nine Nine is a wonderful, lighthearted work environment sitcom and deserves so much love.

Cover Image Credit: spoilertv

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Ontological Universe

The Unifying Nature Of Time Allows Existence To Occur; But What If Existence Is Both Not Created And Already Ended? The Following Thought Experiment Investigates.
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If one observes for a moment the scientific realities of our universe, such as the connection of time within the fabric of space, the fundamental forces of the universe (Electromagnetism, Gravity, and the Nuclear forces), in addition to the quantum entanglement of atomic systems and the structural phenomenon of the Big Bang and the Big Crunch; pondering existence in a speculative manner can be grounded in the scientific truths as we know them thus far. This offers an interesting thought experiment if we expand into the depths of time by perceiving the universe from a dimension above the dimension of space-time. The following is just a theory meant to bring human consciousness to the furthest reaches of its understanding of the universe and itself. This author does not hold any official credentials in theoretical mathematics, physics, etc; so this is written for the fun of intellectual pondering. Readers are welcome to conclude the experiment however they wish.

So to the point of the Theory: Let us suppose for a moment three things 1. The Big Bang, the Birth of the Universe, never happened. 2. The universe, in its expansion, is still ontologically within the single point from which the Big Bang sprang. 3.The Big Crunch, the conclusion of the full life of the universe and its collapse back into a single point, already happened.

What exactly does this mean? Since time is all one single "moment"; all of existence is happening in one simultaneous event. This implies if one were to step outside of time and space into a dimension higher than ours, one would be able to perceive the universe been born, growing, and dying; all within the long drawn single event that entropy perpetuates as a forward mechanism of change created by the phenomenon of time. If we set this aside now, and take the mechanism of change that entropy perpetuates, we must recognize the behavior of atomic structure that evolves and grows as this change takes place.

We know that all atomic systems exist in an entangled state. This implies that all matter is both created and destroyed simultaneously. How might this be? It is due to the entangled nature of the structures that transcend time from the birth to the death of the universe; which is reliant on the cohesion of the subatomic universe that builds matter. Since the subatomic structure is the first aspect of the universe created during the crucible of creation at the Big Bang, and it is theorized to be one of the last things to breakdown and trigger the Big Crunch; the ontological connection of time spanning these two events builds the simultaneous creation and destruction paradigm. Thus we can take this to a concluding idea by stating all matter both does and does not exist.

How might this be validated if there are fundamental forces of reality that ground existence into itself? This is rooted in the fundamental forces themselves. At the crucible moment of creation, the fundamental forces were at unity, at the end of the universe they will have dissipated completely. If we then take from the perspective of our current place within time and space, and the evolutionary process of the universe; the fundamental forces are separated as the 4 (technically 6 with the superplasma and another force found in recent years). If we again use the stretching of time as a connecting factor, these forces are together in a unified force still in the beginning, while also collapsed at the end; thus connecting the Big Bang and Big Crunch in a simultaneous system via the fundamental forces.

So you are probably asking yourself, what is the point of this thought experiment in hypothesizing that existence hasn’t sprang from a single point yet, that Time is all existing in one “moment”, and has already ended in a collapse back to a single point? There isn’t one. The entire premise of this thought experiment reflects upon the illusory nature of existence that we face as beings that only perceive our reality from our subjective perspective of space and time in which we exist for mere blimps on a cosmic scale. This experiment was to place the unsettling idea that existence already happened, the universe hasn’t been created yet, and that the perspective of linear time is nothing more than an illusion. Now how does this help or gain anything more than intellectual fun?

Let us take for a second the implications of this ontological system in context to even larger scale phenomenon, such as the multiverse. This implies a strange curiosity as to what could exist in this universe of universes. Could this be where a “creator” entity resides? Is one able to perceive not just our universe within the space, but all varieties of universes that could’ve been, and those that did exist in parallel realities? String theory and M theory would suggest that this is indeed plausible and highly possible; to the point that we can verify utilizing our technologies to investigate the furthest reaches of our own universe. The final question that is left with us is, what is the phenomenon of consciousness?

As we have created in this thought experiment, the human mind is able to wrap itself around the idea of not just before and after the universe, experiencing the idea of all of the universe happening all at once; but also a self defining and generating ontological system that could theoretically operate in a manner similar to what we described as “pantheistic“. Only as so far as the idea that the universe created itself, and thus consciousness is the universe itself, experiencing itself. If consciousness is rooted in this ontological system that connects all that has been described, then perhaps consciousness itself can be defined as a fundamental force of nature similar to those that bind and guide the birth and death of existence. Possibly even connecting one universe with all others within the multiverse. As our technologies grows, these questions may find answers.

I hope you’ve enjoyed this intellectual journey across existence itself. There was no fundamental reason for exploring these ideas other than the fun of investigating the far recesses of the universe and the extent the human mind can wrap itself around complex abstract thoughts. Whether or not these ideas are as accurate as science today has recorded them will be something that only time can tell. For now though, we can sit comfortably in knowing that our subjective existence, at least in appearance, is something real that we must face as living creatures. Perhaps value in this can be gained in knowing that we are just droplets in the grand ocean of the Cosmos; and as such, we are One within that great expanse of space-time.

Cover Image Credit: Universe Today

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