National Eating Disorder Awareness Week is this week, February 21-27. Eating disorders is a topic a lot of people like to push aside or ignore completely. Several people like to pretend it is not even a disease and that it does not seem to exist. It is not a "phase" that just girls go through. It affects boys as well; 10-15 percent of those who have an eating disorder are guys. It is not pushing themselves to become thin simply because they want to. It is not a choice or a lifestyle. It is a mental disease. A deadly mental disease.
It is someone looking in the mirror thinking they look obese/overweight, but in reality they can make out every single rib poking out. Picking at the thin layer of skin laying delicately on their prominent bones, they hear a voice yelling — screaming — at them. It says, "You are fat! You are ugly! You have to lose more weight! You can never eat! Food is bad and the enemy!" This voice has a name. Her name would be "Ana."
It is someone fasting for countless hours or even days. They tend to actually look normal weight, even sometimes overweight. They do not look like skin and bones. Then they binge because just the sight of food makes their brain crave it more. They lose control and track of time while they consume over 2000+ calories in such a short amount of time. They grab cookies, crackers, bread, yogurt, anything in sight. Then, they drag themselves into the bathroom to purge, crying the entire time. They cry out for help, while sliding their fingers into their mouth and tears run down their cheeks. Feeling guilty. Embarrassed. Worthless. They don't choose to force the binge and purge. They try to avoid the self-harm. A voice inside their head tells them to do this. The voice is not their conscious. The voice is not any part of them. Her name would be "Mia."
It is someone fasting once again for extensive periods of time. They binge and binge, losing control, just like those who have Mia as a dictator. However, they do no purge. Instead, they sit, dealing with all the hate they feel towards themselves. Their thoughts are going crazy, they are feeling like they are useless and the torture is never going to end. They feel these thoughts constantly, even during a fasting period. They tell themselves it will be the last time it will happen, when deep down they know it will happen again sooner than later. They just want to sleep in their bed forever, but they have been taken by something spelled the same exact way. Their ruler would be BED.
These are just a few of the horrific realities of eating disorders and what they hold in store every single day to those who are trapped inside these harsh matters: Anorexia Nervosa (Ana), Bulimia Nervosa (Mia), and Binge Eating Disorder (BED). Another disorder not described above would be orthorexia, which is when one obsesses with the idea of eating healthy and believing some foods to be "bad." One may ask, "How is eating healthy an eating disorder?" It's not. But orthorexics obsess with the idea, punishing themselves for eating one potato chip. Orthorexia is not a clinically diagnosed eating disorder, but has been proven to lead to others such as anorexia or bulimia.
Some people suffer from one of these terrible disorders. Some suffer from two. Two. At. The. Same. Time. Several anorexics also suffer from bulimia. Some bulimics also suffer from BED, not purging after every binge. This is due mostly to your gag reflexes becoming used to your touch in the back of your throat. That's when bulimics find other methods, such as laxative abuse. Also, some switch disorders. It has been shown that many anorexics become bulimic once they are in recovery. This is mostly due to the restriction of foods for so long; once your brain has it, it becomes a drug.
The consequences of these diseases are health and life threatening. Anorexia has the highest mortality rate of any mental disorder; heart rate slowing to an abnormally low level, hair loss, organ failure, heart failure, osteoporosis, and kidney failure can all be results from anorexia. Tooth decay, calluses on the back of knuckles, osteoporosis, busted blood vessels in the eyes, tearing of the esophagus or stomach lining, and even a heart attack from the force of the self-induced purge are results of bulimia. With BED, consequences can be heart disease, high blood pressure, diabetes, and obesity. For every disorder, these are just a small handful of their effects.
These are not choices and I really wish more people would try to grasp that concept. It is not a choice to not be able to enjoy foods you love. It is not a choice to drag yourself into the bathroom and throw up everything they just consumed. Seriously, think about it. Who likes to throw up when they are sick? So why would you think someone would like to force themselves to do it. They cannot help it. It is a mental disorder for a reason and people need to realize that. You can't choose to have schizophrenia or multiple personality disorder. So why would one choose to have an eating disorder? It is classified in the same categories as these. It has to do with your mental health, not a lifestyle or a choice.
For those struggling, reach out. You're not alone. You can beat this. Anyone with one can. For those who have never had an eating disorder, try to help those struggling. Those struggling may act like we do not want your support, but you showing compassion means more to us than you know. For those who have beat an eating disorder, you are awesome. Always have been, always will be. And to everyone, you are all beautiful.
