Let’s face it; mean girls are EVERYWHERE! No matter what stage in life you're in, you are always going to encounter one of them. Let’s get one thing straight before we continue. What is a mean girl, you may ask? Well, a “mean girl” is someone who thinks they are above others in any or all aspects of their life, whether they publicly show it or not. They may roll their eyes continuously, talk bad about you or your friends, make rude jokes about people, and deal with their own insecurities by taking advantage of and putting others down.
Now that you know what a mean girl is, how do you approach dealing with them? I’ll be honest here, I’ve never had the best of luck in choosing friends. I had drama in elementary, middle, AND high school! Some of which with the same people (crazy, I know, right?). Anyway, there are many ways to approach the “mean girl” situation, depending on the circumstances. I’ve compiled a list of dos and don’ts to help y’all through this all-too-common struggle while still remaining the bigger person (go you!). Always remember to take the high road! Reciprocating their nasty attitude will only reflect badly on yourself, and it’s totally not worth it. Plus, 9/10 times it will only make whatever they’re doing worse than it was to begin with. Let’s get started.
DON'T: indirectly bash them on social media.
DO: block them (and their family) on if necessary.
In fact, don't say anything negative about them at all. No matter how bad you want to fight back, stay strong! It's not worth it. Your lack of response will leave them wondering if 1) you saw it and 2) if you're bothered by it (which you shouldn't be- you're being the bigger person, after all!). Yes, blocking people on social media is okay. It's your business you are posting about and you have a right to control who does and doesn't see it. No, blocking them doesn't mean they "won." It simply means that you are through with hearing them make remarks about what you've posted, or seeing them post (or sub-tweet) you. Don't be ashamed or feel bad, you're doing the right thing.
DON'T: fight fire with fire.
DO: take the high road; kill them with kindness.
If they say something rude to or about you, ignore it. They are saying/doing things to get a reaction from you. Don't give them one, no matter how bad you want to. Selena said it best, and she was right. Kill 'em with kindness. It'll drive them crazy, I promise. Their main goal is to upset you and get you to react negatively towards them, so when you don't, they're confused. Don't sarcastically smile at them though, try your hardest to make it as genuine as possible.
DON'T: let them see you upset.
DO: ignore them, smile on.
It's okay that you feel hurt by the mean things they're saying. After all, mean girls are just bullies. The truth is, you're probably not the only one being attacked. It's important that no matter how hurt you are, you don't let them see. You can do this the ways I've mentioned earlier: ignoring, being kind, smiling. You have no reason to let the negative remarks get you down. You're beautiful just the way you are, so believe it! They might even be jealous of you.
DON'T: talk about them. Ever.
DO: stand up for yourself. Always.
This is probably the trickiest and most difficult one. When people come up to you wanting to tell you a story or something this girl said, simply change the subject. Don't listen to it, don't respond to it. People will see that it's not a big deal to you and leave you alone. However, if the matter is serious and what's being said about you is not true (which it most of the time isn't), you have every right to defend yourself. It's okay to reach out to an older friend or adult who may be able to help the situation. It doesn't mean you're being a tattle-tale. You're doing what you need to do to keep yourself safe.
DON'T: let what they say dwindle your self-confidence.
DO: be true to yourself.
It's hard to be confident and feel your best when someone is constantly knocking you down. Trust me, I know. I really do. This is something you need to work on personally. Whether you're dealing with mean girls for 3 months or 3 years, always put yourself and caring about yourself first. Knowing that you are being the bigger person is the number 1 step to feeling good about yourself! Smile. Smile often. Even when you don't feel like smiling, do it anyway, and it will trick your mind into a good mood (it sounds silly, but it works!). Just remember that the situation won't last forever, but you'll always have you. Take care of yourself and hold true to what you believe in, no matter who or what is tearing you down.
