I am bad at math. Which is really quite a large understatement if I'm being entirely honest. A more accurate way to describe my lack of ability at anything math related would be through some descriptive adjectives such as: horrendous, appalling, unpleasant, horrific, deplorable, alarming, etc. (some of those may better describe the act of watching me attempt math). Let me put it this way: if a dog and I were vying for the chance to tutor you in anything math related please Lord choose the dog because I honestly think it would be able to offer you more help than I ever could. Not one dog in particular either, any dog really. But I digress.

There is just really no way of going around it. I am, and forever will be, bad at math.

This is not for lack of trying either. I have gone to tutoring in many different varieties. I have tried study sessions and online help. I have gone to teachers/professors/peers/parents/etc. for assistance so many times that I have lost track. No matter how hard i try, nothing sticks. I just don't have a math wired brain.

Which is something that I am okay with. Math has never interested me to begin with and I don't think it ever will, even if I somehow become good at it in the looming future.

That is marginally (okay maybe not so marginally) the reason that I will never be going into any career field involving math. Which is good because no one wants that. No one. Seriously, there is no one on this planet that wants me to be doing their taxes, calculating really anything, etc.

That leads me to my point (finally). I'm okay with the fact that I won't be going into a math-related field. I will never be engineer material nor accountant nor math teacher. And that is all fine by me.

As a college student, and a young adult in general, I am frequently bombarded with questions from adults around me about my future plans, goals, etc. "What are you studying?" "What kind of job do you want?" "Are you going to grad school?" "You aren't going to be making any money, you know that right?"

I am an English major. This is a relatively new track for me considering that I declared last semester and yet I am incredibly content with my choice. Happy even. It is what I enjoy doing every day. I don't dread waking up and going to classes (no more than usual at least). I realize that I will more than likely not be making fantastic amounts of money anytime soon. I, quite honestly, don't even know what kind of job I want after I have graduated. And that is all fine. I am doing what makes me happy. What I enjoy to do.

This isn't specifically about me though. So many students/young adults/adults today are told that what they wish for their future is, for lack of a better term, stupid. Or that the fact that they do not have their lives completely figured out is problematic and irresponsible. And that is so very wrong.

It is okay to not know what you are doing or what you would like to do. It is okay to feel a little (or a lot) lost right now. It is okay that you may want to join a field that may not make you large sums of cash. It is okay.

I'm not saying just don't worry about it. I'm not saying that you should allow yourself to become so confused that you never actually choose a path. I'm not saying that everyone should just up and leave their current track in life for their childhood dreams or hobbies. Some things in life are, unfortunately, quite unrealistic (apologies to my childhood dream of becoming a superhero, maybe next life). What I am saying is that one should never allow the judgement of others to force them into or push them away from a career or path of life. If your passion is to draw/paint/mold, go become an artist. If you enjoy numbers, go become a mathematician. If you enjoy the aspects of helping others in their learning experiences, go become a teacher. If you are passionate about something, go after it. If you don't have a clue as to where you are going, keep your options open and explore them.

Nothing is worse than being told that what you enjoy to do, and would like to perhaps do as a career, is foolish. Don't allow others to stifle your creativity. Give support to your peers while they are also attempting to follow their dreams. Explore your options and keep an open mind. Realize and understand that you have your whole life ahead of you to figure out where you are going and all the other specifics. Don't stress yourself out. You got this!

Give yourself time to figure everything out. And a little leeway as well. This is your life and you get to call the shots. Be happy with whatever you choose to do. And allow others to also be happy in their choices.

I'm Emily. I am an English major. I do not know what I am doing or what I would like to be doing and that is okay. I am figuring it out and I am happy.