I'm A Black Woman And I'm Not Foreign

Trey Songz has made the message clear: If she’s foreign, she’s winning. All throughout his single, "Foreign," he proceeds to profess his love for women who are not of American descent.

Here are a few lines from his song that showcase how he feels about women from other countries: “Colombiano, yeah I love that. I love her if she speak another language. She from another country, I brought her to the city with me. I know it's never boring.”

This is the mindset of many black "boys” today. I call them boys because men, real men, would not degrade their own kind. Black men would not make black women, their sisters, feel less of a woman because they do not originate from a different country.

It’s sad to see my generation of black men so fascinated by women who cannot relate to them. Intrigued by women who cannot empathize with them or share the same history with them. Light skin, long hair, thick in the hips, huge buttocks and talk another language. These are the characteristics that boys profess that they need in a woman. She doesn’t have to be smart, she doesn’t have to have goals and ambition. I’m sorry, but where is the respect? Where are the standards? What happened to the idea of dating a girl or woman you can bring home to “mama?” Instead they seem to be more concerned with, “who can I bring to my sheets?” I’m starting to realize that boys today want nothing but a trophy piece. Arm candy, someone they can show off and flaunt.

How about a woman who can help you grow? A woman whose roots go deeper than just her curves and wide hips. Please don’t get this message misconstrued, there is nothing wrong with interracial relationships. People are free to love who they want. However, the idea of dating a “foreign" girl, and its misconceptions, have to be stopped. It’s degrading to both sides.

Black men have to do better. They have to realize that black women are a prized possession and only want to help our men grow and prosper. We want nothing but the best for them. Regardless of how they treat us. As black woman, we have been raised to love our black brothers, raise them up to be the true kings that they are. In return, we are tossed to the side and picked over for the Latina beauty, or the girl that’s from the islands.

The media plays a major role with this problem. All throughout the music industry you see celebrities singing and praising about women who are from the islands. Music videos all consist of going to different countries and being surrounded by exotic women.

Black women, as a race, already have the odds against them. Not only do we have to worry about being African-American women and fighting for equality -- we, now, have to deal with the fact that we weren’t all born in exotic places or have “foreign blood” running through our veins. Please tell me how are supposed to accommodate for something we have no control over?

Black men, you have to do better. Uplift and build the black queens. Love them for who they are and what they represent. Which is you.

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