“Babe, it’s different this time. I’m going to change, I’m going to try harder,” he says for the fifth time, and you go back to him, just like you always do. Despite what your friends say, despite what your parents say, you go back to him, just for him to act the same way. It starts the same and ends the same. Every time. You go back to him because you love him and here’s why you shouldn’t:

• You broke up for a reason. Whether it was a huge issue or a petty argument, there is a reason you broke up. It mattered enough to both of you to end the relationship, and if not worked out, it will always be there, just sitting in the back of your mind.
• It will never be the same. You were both affected by the breakup, and it will never be like it was before. If he broke up with you, you will act different around him. You’ll catch yourself on your best behavior in front of him, always wanting to make him happy because you are in fear of losing the relationship. You’ll find yourself worried about what he will think when this is the person you used to trust to not judge you for being yourself. And if you are the person that did the breaking up, you’ll be forcing yourself to try harder to make it work when it used to be so easy. Either way, you are both struggling.
• You’re not the same people you were in the beginning. At this point in our lives, we are always changing. This is a point of growth, and depending on the circumstances of the relationship, people either grow together or apart. If you grew apart, chances are that’s part of the reason you broke up, and there’s no reversing it. You may find yourself wishing that things would go back to the way they were when you two were so in love, but they can’t. You aren’t the same people anymore and there’s no changing it.
• One always cares more. Most likely, the break up wasn’t mutual. This means that someone is always going to care more and want it to work out more than the other, which isn’t fair. The feelings should be reciprocated and both of you should feel wanted.
• You’re only hurting each other. If you’re on-again and off-again, it’s time to just face the fact that it’s not meant to be. Sometimes the problem just doesn’t have a solution. Trying and trying with someone who doesn’t have the same feelings just hurts you and creates resentment towards the other person for not having those feelings. With that resentment comes anger, which turns into an ugly final breakup.

So when he calls for the sixth time, just stop. Don’t answer the phone, don’t text him back. You know how it’s going to end. Just let the phone ring and delete his number. Go out with your friends and meet someone new. Save yourself the heartache. You don’t deserve it.