Have you or someone you know ever been in an abusive relationship? It is so sad to admit but the number of relationships that involve abuse have drastically risen over the years. This number is especially high in teenage relationships. Nearly 1.5 million high school students nationwide experience physical abuse from a dating partner in a single year. Almost half (43%) of dating college women report experiencing violent and abusive dating behaviors. So what can you do to help someone in an abusive relationship? Or how can you help yourself get out of an abusive relationship despite how difficult that may seem?
First we have to define what an abusive relationship is. This is very difficult because what is considered abuse is different to everyone. Anything harmful to you mentally, emotionally, or physically can be considered abuse. If you feel uncomfortable with it then the simple thing to do would be to leave your partner or just suggest that the person you think is being abused leave their partner right?
You have to understand that people in abusive relationships do not realize that they are in abusive relationships. They often think that what they are experiencing is considered a "normal relationship" because the people that they are with are telling them so. Their abuser will make them feel like they are nothing better than dirt on the ground and that no one else will ever want them. Sadly, often times they will begin to believe them after hearing it repetitively. I have seen the strongest of humans become crippled people because of constant emotional and psychological abuse to the point where they do not even have their own identity anymore.
You can not push people who are in abusive situations to do something. This will only result in them retreating further into their relationships and cutting off all other people in their lives. You have to approach them like you would a stray kitten, slowly and cautiously. The biggest thing that you can do for these people is to offer support. You may absolutely hate the person that they are with and the relationship that they are in but it is so important to let them feel like they are leaving the relationship on their own without influence. They know that you care and they will appreciate your efforts one day, but that day may no be today. Eventually, they will thank you for encouraging them to leave, but you should also tell them why they should not be afraid to leave and support them through it all.
What are some examples of when you should leave?
If they are pushing you away from your friends and family.
If they tell you that no one else would ever love you other than them.
If they make you a worse person rather than a better person.
If they physically touch you against your will.
If they blatantly disregard everything you ask them to do.
If they pressure you into things you do not want to do, and guilt trip you because of it.
