Do You See What I See?

Do You See What I See?

Sight: (n). a thing that one sees or can be seen, to see or observe.
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I see anger and aggression. I see love and compassion. I see hurt and brokenness. I see strength. I see humanity.

Sight is a gift we all take for granted. The ability to see another being is truly incredible. To see the emotion of someone when they are excited or sad is so beautiful. We neglect the beauty of the three toothed grin of the baby who just handed you their toy. The small things we skip over on a daily basis: sunsets, smiles, and messy hair. There is so much to learn, so much to feel.

Seeing is so much more than two cellular structures working together with nerves to form images. Seeing is the ability to love. To see the love and passion in a single mother's face as her baby boy walks across the stage at his college graduation. Seeing is sadness. The vision of a family being bombed in their home during dinner. Seeing is pain. The sight of a child in Syria being pulled from the rubble, not breathing. Seeing is hope. The hope in the young girl's eyes as her new family signs the adoption papers making her their's. Seeing is happiness. The pure joy in a couple's face when they are told the IVF treatment had been a success. Sight isn't just another sense. It is the ability to see into another person's world, to feel what they feel in that moment.

We can learn so much from a fragment of an image if we truly see it.

Let us open our eyes. Let's stare at the wonders of the world we all too often look over. Let us feel what others are feeling. Our hearts shall break and mend.

Open your eyes to the beauty around you. To the toddler toddling around the restaurant. See the pain happening overseas, and understand that you can do something to help. Feel the heat dissipating as the sun sets over the hillside. See your mother's laughter as she watches you balance a spoon on your sister's nose. Pay attention to the nurse as he walks out of the Emergency Room after his 72 hour shift. Watch the little girl's reaction as she sees her dad after months of him being overseas. See every emotion, every movement.

See each day in complete clarity and not just spots of what is "important."

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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I'm The Girl Without A 'Friend Group'

And here's why I'm OK with it

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Little things remind me all the time.

For example, I'll be sitting in the lounge with the people on my floor, just talking about how everyone's days went. Someone will turn to someone else and ask something along the lines of, "When are we going to so-and-so's place tonight?" Sometimes it'll even be, "Are you ready to go to so-and-so's place now? Okay, we'll see you later, Taylor!"

It's little things like that, little things that remind me I don't have a "friend group." And it's been like that forever. I don't have the same people to keep me company 24 hours of the day, the same people to do absolutely everything with, and the same people to cling to like glue. I don't have a whole cast of characters to entertain me and care for me and support me. Sometimes, especially when it feels obvious to me, not having a "friend group" makes me feel like a waste of space. If I don't have more friends than I can count, what's the point in trying to make friends at all?

I can tell you that there is a point. As a matter of fact, just because I don't have a close-knit clique doesn't mean I don't have any friends. The friends I have come from all different walks of life, some are from my town back home and some are from across the country. I've known some of my friends for years, and others I've only known for a few months. It doesn't really matter where they come from, though. What matters is that the friends I have all entertain me, care for me, and support me. Just because I'm not in that "friend group" with all of them together doesn't mean that we can't be friends to each other.

Still, I hate avoiding sticking myself in a box, and I'm not afraid to seek out friendships. I've noticed that a lot of the people I see who consider themselves to be in a "friend group" don't really venture outside the pack very often. I've never had a pack to venture outside of, so I don't mind reaching out to new people whenever.

I'm not going to lie, when I hear people talking about all the fun they're going to have with their "friend group" over the weekend, part of me wishes I could be included in something like that. I do sometimes want to have the personality type that allows me to mesh perfectly into a clique. I couldn't tell you what it is about me, but there is some part of me that just happens to function better one-on-one with people.

I hated it all my life up until very recently, and that's because I've finally learned that not having a "friend group" is never going to be the same as not having friends.

SEE ALSO: To The Girls Who Float Between Friend Groups

Cover Image Credit: wordpress.com

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In Real Life, 'Plus Size' Means A Size 16 And Up, Not Just Women Who Are Size 8's With Big Breasts

The media needs to understand this, and give recognition to actual plus-size women.

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Recently, a British reality dating TV show called "Love Island" introduced that a plus-sized model would be in the season five lineup of contestants. This decision was made after the show was called out for not having enough diversity in its contestants. However, the internet was quick to point out that this "plus-size model" is not an accurate representation of the plus-size community.


@abidickson01 on twitter.com


Anna Vakili, plus-size model and "Love Island "Season 5 Contestant Yahoo UK News

It is so frustrating that the media picks and chooses women that are the "ideal" version of plus sized. In the fashion world, plus-size starts at size 8. EIGHT. In real life, plus-size women are women who are size 16 and up. Plunkett Research, a marketing research company, estimated in 2018 that 68% of women in America wear a size 16 to 18. This is a vast difference to what we are being told by the media. Just because a woman is curvy and has big breasts, does NOT mean that they are plus size. Marketing teams for television shows, magazines, and other forms of media need to realize that the industry's idea of plus size is not proportionate to reality.

I am all for inclusion, but I also recognize that in order for inclusion to actually happen, it needs to be accurate.

"Love Island" is not the only culprit of being unrealistic in woman's sizes, and I don't fully blame them for this choice. I think this is a perfect example of the unrealistic expectations that our society puts on women. When the media tells the world that expectations are vastly different from reality, it causes women to internalize that message and compare themselves to these unrealistic standards.

By bringing the truth to the public, it allows women to know that they should not compare themselves and feel bad about themselves. Everyone is beautiful. Picking and choosing the "ideal" woman or the "ideal" plus-size woman is completely deceitful. We as a society need to do better.

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