I woke up this morning wanting to delete all my social media accounts (as I usually do) because the second my eyes open I have to check up on what everyone is seeing for the first time as well. I need comfort in the form of visual expression versus my own comfort of my inner self waking up to see the sun shining across my bed frame. I would rather fill my mind/heart up with useless information about who Jennifer is dating than read my mother's favorite poetry book stuffed into my petite desk.

"I could probably get rid of my phone and be okay, I should just cancel my plan.”

But then all the logical reasons set in.

“Well, if I’m in trouble this could save my life. I need to contact people I care about, and record images/videos of moments that matter.” and so on and so on.

Each reason spiraling me back to the feeling that I NEED this phone in order to function in today's society, which is pretty true. Our world is surrounded by technology that I could even harm my possibilities of a job by not having a cell-phone that they can reach whenever needed or even Facebook so that I can join their mandatory group. I cannot find an escape from this phone that needs to be glued to me, and I think I’m one of the few millennials that really hates that. I don’t have an addiction to my cell phone, I actually despise my cell phone/social media, but I’m smart enough to understand that I can’t live a productive life in today's society without it (which irks me more.)

So, with this information behind my belt I decided to start paying attention to all my friends around me and how glued they were to their cell-phones or how much information they needed to post onto social media. I watched my friends do simple tasks like ‘do the laundry’ ‘go out to eat’ ‘go to the bathroom’ and other little things and realized that usually their phones were always in their hands. A simple task like getting rid of human bodily waste required your phone? I never saw it as that. We would go out to eat and I would watch as my friends would be talking to me while texting back another person, simultaneously. What?! How haven’t I noticed that before, that while they were having a conversation they also felt the uncomfortable need to write back to another immediately.

Overall I was shocked by the blatant disregard of it all, as if it was humanly normal for us to be this attached to technology. Was I the only person who felt this way? Was I the party pooper in the generation? Should I just be quiet and drink the Kool-Aid?

All these questions started to pop into my head all geared towards being the ‘odd’ man out because I couldn’t stand the constant need for instant gratification that phones allowed us. I then just sat down with myself and really started to underlie the real reasons why I use my phone constantly, and it all boiled down to distraction. Distraction from reality. I’m having a stressful time, go on phone. I’m having an anxiety filled day, go on phone. I want someone to pay attention to me, go on phone. I was distracting myself from the fundamental things that people go through daily, by just putting that pin number into my phone.

Are you someone who brings their phone everywhere? Why? Did you find out like I did or are you still dealing with underlying issues?