Divorce can be a touchy subject to bring up, but since I have divorced parents I'm going to say what I think is the ugly truth. According to the American Psychological Association (stick with me, big names are boring, I know) 40-50% of marriages in the United States end up divorced. So about half. Half of about 327.2 million people end up divorced. Let's face it, divorce is common.
People view divorce as such a bad thing, but let's be real since when have things ever worked out the way you planned? I can without a doubt say when my parents got married, they didn't plan on getting divorced in the future, because that would just be a waste of time.
Now I'm not waving a big white flag and screaming "hey everyone, let's get divorced!" However, sometimes getting divorced is necessary in my opinion.
I grew up in a Catholic household, so for those of you who know about us Catholic people you know that we don't speak lightly on divorce. It's a big no-no. Instead, Catholics are more likely to get an annulment, which is a document that says "just kidding this marriage never happened".
After my mom got the divorce the church recommended my mom to get the annulment, but my mom didn't want to because in doing so, this would have made my sister and I bastards. So, my mom and dad got a divorce, and did not go through with an annulment.
This was probably the most difficult thing that my mom and dad ever had to do. A lot changes after a divorce. You become a single parent, you live on your own, which changes your life and the lives of your children.
I am particularly lucky because the divorce happened early in my life so I was able to adapt to it very easily, I think I was in 4th grade, maybe 5th. My parents divorced and both met new people and are happy with their lives, so I'm happy too. My mom had another baby. If it weren't for the divorce I wouldn't have my brother, so I am grateful in the end.
To add to the greatness of divorce, the kids have it made! Divorce to the kids involved means two of everything. Two birthday celebrations, two Christmases, two Easter baskets, and double the family! When you're young you also learn how to work your parents. You know that one parent will say no, so you just ask the other that will say yes, no big deal. Unfortunately, my parents caught onto that and actually started communicating with each other.
Now, of course, there is always a down side to everything. For instance, having two rooms to clean, having to tell both parents everything all the time, they still argue sometimes, and lets just hope you don't forget something at one house. Then you have to go all the way back to the other house to go get it. Before I had my license was the worst, because if I forgot something and neither of my parents could get it for me I was shit out of luck.
At the end of the day, my parents argued all the time and weren't happy. What person would want to force them to be together? Who would that help? No one. The way I see it that makes everyone miserable. I'm happy with how the divorced turned out and I wouldn't have it any other way.
In my mind it is impossible to say that in 20 years you're still going to want to be married to the same person. Do you want to be? Of course! It would be silly if you didn't, but things happen and people change over time. Sometimes you just can't grow with them no matter how much you want too. That's just not the way the real world works anymore. That, my friends, is the ugly truth.