Depression isn’t real. This overwhelming sadness that never seems to go away—that’s all in your head. The fatigue that seems to take over your life and dictate your social schedule—that can simply be fixed by going to the gym regularly and getting 8-10 hours of sleep a night. All of our insignificant issues get overlooked as problems that "everyone goes through," therefore depression can be seen as an easy problem to get over. Depression doesn’t seem like a real disease, illness, or disability.

But it is.

Depression is a debilitating illness that leaves the person feeling alone and unloved. The lucky ones have supportive family who take care of them even when they don’t think they need help. The lucky ones have enough money to try countless number of medication and treatment options. The lucky ones also find a treatment that works for them and put them in remission. (Yes I just used the word "remission," a word that is used to state that a serious medical issue has been fixed, for now). The unlucky ones stick it out alone. The unlucky ones end up spiraling out of control and ending their lives or resorting to a life of addiction.

Depression is real.

It can be caused by a severe traumatic event or by chemical imbalances in the brain. There are several different types of depression and anxiety. There is major, manic, psychotic, situational, and other types of depression. They are big names that mean people are suffering from a severe mood disorder. There is no cure. Does that phrase sound familiar? It is usually used in sever illnesses that have walks to raise money and philanthropies that support them. Depression and anxiety are mental disorders that have less support than many persistent diseases.

Now, here come the statistics to back up my statements. According to health line, 1 in 10 people have depression in the United States. That is 10% of 318.9 million people. Which is 31.89 million people in the United States who suffer from depression and that just the people who are diagnosed. Even with this high number of people and the numerous personal stories, some still believe that depression is all in people’s head.

Depression sucks.

It feels like it literally sucks the life out of you. It feels like no one likes you and your brain makes sure you remember all of your insecurities and fears regularly. All of your emotions and insecurities are heightened. You feel as if every decision you make is the wrong one and that no one could possibly love you for who you are. Therefore, you put on a mask to cover up you problems—because who wants to be friends with someone who has issues? You alienate yourself from the people who love you and fake the happiness that you think you want people to see because your brain allows you to believe that no one will want to associate with someone who struggles with mental illness. Everyone with depression has different symptoms and issues that they deal with, the above are just examples of how depression can affect people. It sucks when you have people telling you how much they love you, but your brain is telling you that it is all lies. It is a horrible feeling when most of your friends become distant from you and your brain telling you that you aren’t worth their love.

You are not alone.

I would hate for anyone to experience what I have, but I still find solace and companionship in those who have suffered like I have. People who haven’t been through this do not understand and I am thankful for that, but it does make some relationships difficult. I am lucky to have amazing parents who, despite never having suffered from depression, have strove (and continue to strive) to help me and understand me the best that they can. I have lost friends because of this disease and gained some. It is difficult because friends don't always know what you need. Most don’t bring up the topic of depression because they figure you don’t want to talk about it. It gets really hard when you start isolating yourself because you have such low energy and don’t reach out to people because you don’t think anyone loves you enough to care.Your friends don’t know how much pain you’re in, so they don’t reach out to you either. The worst is when they know, or you think they know, how horrible you feel and they do nothing, or worse, they make you feel bad for your illness. I am fortunate to have two very dear friends who suffer from similar issues to me, so we lean on each other a lot.

There are people who are there to help.

I do not know why I have depression. I did not suffer from a traumatic event, it just appeared one day (and then snowballed into something much worse). Writing about my experience is therapeutic, and I hope that it helps someone out there browsing the Internet. Whether I know you or we've never met, I hope that this has impacted you for the better.

If you have depression, I hope you find comfort in knowing that you are not alone even thought it may feel like it. People do love and care for you even if you keep telling yourself that they do not.

If you know someone suffering with this horrid disease, then I hope this helped you to understand him or her a littler better. Know that you will never understand this specific pain that they are going through and you don’t have to get it. Just having someone be there for you is a great help. A lot of times, people who suffer from depression don’t know what they need, but they just need someone in the same room with them who doesn’t mind if they cry or scream and who will eat an entire plate of warm chocolate chip cookies with them.

Lastly, I am here for comradery and advice as well as so many more people. There are so many therapist, psychiatrists, and psychologists out there just waiting to change your life for the better. If you don’t match up with one at first, do not despair; you will find a therapist that works with you.

Take care and never be afraid to ask for help.

XO,

Maddie