So I have this awful habit of flat out refusing to make decisions.
I am totally serious. Before you roll your eyes… ask my parents, my friends, my coaches, or my roommates for yourself. I guarantee that they will all agree, without hesitation, that decision making has never been my strong suit. I about worried myself sick trying to decide on a college. I walk around the dining hall aimlessly figuring out what to eat for lunch. I stand in front of my closet for far too long planning my outfit for the day. My friends have quickly learned not to ask me where I want to sit in the dining hall, what time we should go to the gym, or even which restaurant we should venture to. My favorite phrase is probably “I don’t know… what do you think?” Maybe it’s just my personality, my way of trying to be nice, or my refusal to accept the responsibility of making a definite choice… whatever it is caused by, it happens far too often.
Two days ago, I sat in the library chugging my third cup of coffee and questioning if I was really qualified to write an article on decisions (ironic right?). However, the reality is that we, as college students, are constantly bogged down with the weight of our future hanging in the balance. Do any of us truly have things figured out? We are on our own for the very first time in our lives which means that we have the freedom to make choices for ourselves. However, it is far too easy to become overwhelmed with the opinions of our peers, professors, and relatives. Our society likes to tell us that we must have a plan. We must come into college with an idea of what career we want to pursue. We must be absolutely sure of this choice by our sophomore year so we can declare our majors. We must leave college with not only a degree, but also a clear idea of the life we want to live.
But what if we were to stop putting so much pressure on ourselves? What if we approach each day with an open mind and an open heart? What if we stop planning and start trusting? I will never claim to be good at this. I am entirely too dependent on my planner and my to-do lists. I have my degree program printed out and try to follow it exactly. I tend to plan years in advance instead of simply being content where I am. Trust me; I am a work in progress just like the rest of us.
However, in amidst of the craziness when my pride gets too strong, God stops me in my tracks and reminds me that I am not the game-maker. I do not have all the answers and I do not have to make all the decisions alone. In these moments, Proverbs 20:24 always comes to mind: “A man’s steps are directed by the Lord. How then can anyone understand his own way.”
What a beautiful reminder that we are not in control, nor are we supposed to be.
I don’t know what kind of decisions are on your heart today. Maybe you are debating if you should join Greek life. Maybe you are thinking about transferring schools. Maybe you are just trying to decide how to spend your afternoon. No matter what choices you are faced with today, I pray that you have the courage to listen when you hear His voice and choose to trust even when it is hard. As we tackle our second semesters, let’s avoid falling into the pit of anxiety and stress. Never forget that the plans for our lives were so graciously written by the one who holds our lives in His hand. We only need to trust.
“Teach me your way, O Lord, and I will walk in your truth; give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name.”
-Psalm 86:11
Let this be our prayer today and every day.
