Dear 16-year-old me,

Spoiler alert: everything works out.

Every laugh, shout, and tear, has gone toward creating me, but I do think there are a few things to know that will make our journey a little smoother.

At 16, you, along with everyone else, is still trying to figure out who you are in this crazy world. Today at 18 years old, I fully acknowledge I still have a tremendous amount of growing to do, while I also believe the last two years have been a period of magnificent transformation.

Please know I am proud of you. I know it hasn’t been easy, although you have handled the majority of tough situations with grace. You are desperately trying to convince yourself everything is perfect, but it is 100 percent acceptable to acknowledge that it’s not. You have countless people in your life who want to see you happy, be your support system, and provide the wakeup call you desperately need. Allow those people in: you will be grateful for them in the long run.

The girls that turned on you will soon be forgotten. You’ll have falling outs with friends at the most inconvenient times, but don’t worry, they will never leave your side when it really matters. Always be mindful of those you invest your time and energy in, although I want you to know that at 18 you have an incredible group of friends that make you beam with happiness. I’m telling you this because you’re going to go through years of “best friends” letting you down, and it is better to have a few great friends than many that don’t have your back. Throughout the next two years you’ll be surrounded by incredible people. The good ones will never make you feel like less of the woman you’re becoming.

Loosen up a little; life doesn’t need to be so black and white. I know you like having a plan and knowing why something is the way it is, but live a little and have fun. I know you think if you loosen up you’ll lose track of who you are and where you came from, but you are in charge of your own destiny. You can decide how your environment will affect you. I can tell you now as a freshman in college, having fun by no means limits your level of success, and trust me, we will be successful.

Value high school. I know that’s a crazy concept to wrap your head around, but you will look back and realize those days were easy. When you head off to college you will miss the comfort of mom and dad’s safe hugs, and you’ll miss the familiarity and the people that fell in place along the way.

I know you do your best to base your life on all things positive, but it is okay to be sad and acknowledge life isn’t going exactly as planned, but also know that it never will. Asking for help is not a weakness, but rather a sign of bravery. Life has a funny way of throwing the occasional curve ball, but then just like that, the light comes on and you will be given a new perspective. Talk about things that matter, and listen to others when they do the same.

Stop trying to make the boy you think you love a better person. You know the guy I am talking about, the one with a horrible reputation. One day he will pay attention to you and you’ll be willing to do anything for his approval. He’ll make you feel like you’re on top of the world. He’ll convince you to be someone you’re not. Along the way you’ll feel as though you’re changing him into the good guy you always knew he could be. Well, you’re wrong. Stop making excuses for the way he hurts you and leave him, he won’t change. Your closest friends will be there for the countless days of heartbreak and not once will they say “I told you so.” In time you’ll come to terms with this first relationship. You’ll realize distancing yourself from the guy you thought you once loved has helped mold you into who you are and will give you the confidence to be your own magnificent person. Accept apologizes and move on. Do not weaken to his crying and persuading.

Try to not compare yourself to every other girl you’ve met because I can almost guarantee they have done the same to you. Each person is unique and differences deserve to be recognized and celebrated.

We have years of adventure ahead of us. Let’s make a pact to take each experience as it comes and continue to live life positively. We are a light in this world and deserve to shine.

All my love,

Your #1 Fan