I am made of glimmering star dust and precious-sweet honey and you will never again be able to experience either of those things. No longer am I the little girl who sat crying in her bedroom because her best friend (and possibly only friend) was mad at her. I don't sit up in my tower and wait for some strong, handsome, Brutus to come sweep me off my feet and keep me from being lonely. Nights spent sleeping on tear-stained pillows are nothing but a vision of my past that I promise myself will never revisit me again. The word “family” means little without the qualities that are supposed to accompany that title. Caring? No. Responsible? Not really. Genuine? Hell no. Memories are nothing but a feature on Facebook.

Grudges may bring people down, but so do toxic relationships. People who are supposed to be there for you aren't supposed to be the ones leaving you with such immeasurable heartbreak that you wish for nothing more than for the pain to stop. I have laid in bed for many consecutive days and yearned, deeply, for that boy to text me back. I have wondered what could possibly be so wrong with me that he would want nothing to do with me anymore. I have sat in utter panic as my best friend is angry with me and hoped that she wouldn't let me go, because she was all I had. My insecurities have led me to believe that pain = love, that strenuous relationships are the strongest. They have made me become submissive to those close to me. You have to do everything your best friend says in order to keep their friendship, right?

Respect comes from respect. Just because someone is older than you or related to you does not mean respect is necessary. To the family members who have made me feel bullied, unloved, and worthless, you do not deserve my respect. To my old best friends who only used me to feel powerful, you don't deserve it either. To the boy who is only texting me because he broke up with his girlfriend, are you kidding me? I have grown to love myself so deeply that I will never again look back to patch up broken relationships.

I know what love is and what it feels like. I know what care feels like. It's having friends who leave you wondering how you could have possibly gotten to lucky to have them in your life. It's getting texts from the boy who was your first great love, even though you two aren't together, saying that he misses you and wants to know how you're doing. Crying over old relationships does nothing but bring you down to the point where you can't tell what's right and what's wrong. I am not your charity case or sob story anymore. I am myself, and my own love is all I could ever need.