Dear Body,

I'm writing this letter to you because I realize something now that I never fully understood before.

I finally get it.

After almost 22 years with you, I have done more bad than good. The self-destruction, negative thoughts and constant comparison have drained me, but most of all those have drained you. And for all the pain I have caused you, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for never believing you were good enough - never athletic enough, skinny enough, healthy enough, pretty enough. Although you could walk, run, skip and jump I never thought you were the best; you were my body, so you couldn't be the best, right? My thoughts overcame the best fragments of you, turning the beautiful to ugly, the strong to weak, the healthy to unhealthy, the perfect to imperfect.

I'm sorry for starving you of nutrients when my world was collapsing in. Instead of using you to create a more energized, happier individual I decided to choose the junk food to make the moment better, but clearly making it worse. I chose the easy way out - but then, I was never satisfied with you. You starved for far too long and craved a nourishing love that I failed to provide.

I'm sorry for depleting your overall potential through countless late night nonsense. I chose numerous Netflix marathons, last-minute papers, online shopping and anything unimportant over giving you the rest that you deserve; the rest that is needed after a full day of activity, brain power, and simply living. I traded your health for the last ten episodes of Gossip Girl, an unnecessary pair of shoes and late-night ice cream binges - all only came with regret the following morning.

I'm sorry for failing to speak about you in a positive, uplifting manner as if you were some parasite I couldn't wait to rid of. You received compliments beyond belief, yet never from me; in fact, I counteracted every kind phrase with an equally negative thought. You were applauded and admired, but those were lost in translation with my thoughts of disgust, despair and jealousy. Your beauty was hidden because I only saw the unacceptable pieces of you, never the perfect whole.

I'm sorry I spent years comparing you to those people you could never be. The hours of staring at other girls' "happy" profiles on social media tortured my heart into believing that you failed to make me happy. The fit girl at the gym caused me to covet a body with far less fat than my own. The modeling world made me think that only one type of body was acceptable - and you clearly were not it. I believed that you were supposed to be like the edited woman on the magazine cover and for that I was mistaken.

I'm sorry for forgetting that you are mine. I've spent hours, no... days, of my life dwelling on what others would think of you, how they would react to you, what they would say about you. I focused on family, friends', and strangers' opinions using those to fuel my longing to fix you, not for myself but for them. Instead of choosing self-love, I yearned for the comments of others to feel that you were good enough.

Simply: I'm sorry for not loving you for what you are, only what I wished you would be.

But that all ends today.

Those 'sorrys' are the beginning of a new mindset; a mindset that includes positive self-talk, confidence and a love for you that no one can hinder.

Today, Body, I want to thank you. Thank you for being perfect. Thank you for making me, me.